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tv   The Greg Gutfeld Show  FOX News  February 21, 2016 7:00pm-8:01pm PST

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>> i am greg gutfeld once again straight from the local penitentiary. here's what's coming up, victory for donald trump. the establishment couldn't get over the hump. the tomatoes in my garden plump. hillary wins bernie sin spins. the grapple national security in one corner right to privacy in another. i am in the middle eating a delicious taco. let's get started, america. i have a hot yoga class with my good friend eric estrada. >> let's welcome tonight's guest. he handles polls like a seasoned
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stripper. chris dar well pox news politics editor. he gets another snishgs than a fat kid on halloween comedian nick depalo. he can strangle you with a strand of angle hair pasta and beat your friend to death with an egg noodle. former cia operative. and her hobbyist gin it's joanna notch notch notch ski /* /- no ch >> here we are. a quick wrap on yesterday's south carolina republican primary. donald trump won by 10 points marco rubio edged ted cruz for second. jeb bush he bailed. finally. here's my take. you know that kid in school whose parents through extravagant birthday parties hoping some of his classmates would show up but most of them
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don't? that was jeb's campaign. >> i am proud of the campaign we have run beau the people in iowa new shafrp thinker and iowa have spoken. i respect their decision. tonight i am suspending my campaign. >> can't even do that well. >> good luck, little soldier. >> donald is a popular jock in school whose sescircle krefr on wants to join because they might stuff their head in a locker. >> a number of pundits said well if a couple of other candidates dropped out if you add their scores together it is going to equal trump. the geniuses. the geniuses. then there is rubio taking
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second but looking like a kid selling magazine subscriptions so he can pay his way to summer camp. he's not just boyish he's a lost oz man, a cuban potsie. >> a 21st century conservative movement. if a son of a bartender and made from cuba tonight stands one step closer to being the 45th president of the united states of america. >> and what a cruz trump holy rolled him. he didn't get the evangelicals. those are just people. it's like me being shunned by the um paw loom baus. like michael moore shunning a pie. there is only one candidate who has led the fight against amnesty who has led the fight against obamacare who led the fight to defend light and marriage and religious liberty.
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>> there you have it. the crowd is winning. i have one guy who matter hoping he might still have a chance i mean vermin supreme. >> mandatory tooth brushing, zombie preparedness time calorie search and free ponies for all americans. >> well you are the expert in all of this stuff. >> your career is over. what are your thoughts on this? running the table. i don't know what that means. it has to do with ding dong ditch. the secret for trump is you have to have it rise up out of you.
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it calls to trump supporters. you harken to the space. >> they were right. >> of course they are right. >> the republicans are terrible at the party. terrible in the politics stuff. >> donald trump is kicking their behinds. >> donald trump is crushing the republicans. they wanted to believe after iowa they lost the bid in iowa. let's go back to killing marco rubio. that's stupid. that's really dump. they have to focus on trump. trump is engaged in what is called the lever vaj buyout. he's oo minority stake holder a minority shareholder but the rest of the votes are too divided to stand up to his offer. now the board is hitting the
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left. there are fewer of them. it will at some point become a trump or contra trump. >> contra trump. that moment will come and when it does it will be bad for trump. >> i had contra trump for six weeks. i had to take mal treks. it still comes back. >> moderate to bear? >> exactly. >> humor raw. >> they are doing all of the fox commercials. >> i reverse mortgage by catheter. >> you could have gotten one of those. >> they have all of my cathet s catheters. >> what the hell happened last night? you idiot. >> jeb bush, i can't believe he got into the race for the first time with that name.
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every time i heard jeb bush i heard the music they played with somebody loses. when he said he was suspending his campaign he said please clap. >> you think i like trump? >> trump is ripping off you. >> anti immigrants. okay, you got me. >> i am convinced that trump listens to your bod cast. everything he says he says a day before. >> he would be bepter if he listened to my podcast. >> it would double your audience. >> we can't lose. trump, cruz, rubio. come on. 90-year-old socialist who is getting young women's votes. >> you talking about hillary? >> you know, you girls want to feel the bern, have unprotected sex. thank you, nick. >> you know what? that's a great message for america's use and i applaud you for that.
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it is. he told you to wear protection. the former cia, one thing that worries me about trump vague about the specifics. but how do you feel af saturday? >> i feel like we are approaching the end days. i understand it. i get it. at first it was the entertainment value. that whole frost at the beginning of this exercise thought jeb bush was going to do it because he had the support and dollars. now all of that brain trust is saying i don't know why he bothered to get into this race. nobody saw this coming. >> i did. i told him to run. you were there. >> i was. >> you were there when i told him to run for president. >> i did. he was planning on it anyway. we were in office i said you should run. if i run the whole place is going to go crazy. they will seeing in like this. that's my impression of trump. >> people made that leap from
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him being entertaining to somehow jumped that chasm to think, he's a good president. he's presidential material. at some point, we have to look at things. it is not going to be bernie sanders. it will be hillary clinton. >> he might do it because we have all of the former contest tavents from the apprentice that can come out. whatever she says -- >> it's true. >> he is getting people outside of the party. right? >> i think so. he does appeal to a large range of people by being so vague. >> everybody can be angry. >> everyone can be angry. as a woman i have so many emotions. >> you do. you do. >> i definitely get that the emotional aspect.
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>> very emotional. not the whole time. >> when he is up against a rubio who can really offer those policy plans one is going to be more prepared than the other. >> neither is offering specifics when can we step back and say president trump. >> it's possible. i want to brink cat in because cat you always have a aun neek perspective from the libertarian point of view what i like to call the point of view that will never get elected. >> well, yeah. we can see from the rise of trump that reasonable ideas are not so popular which is unfortunate. i have spent a lot of my day being sad about jeb bush. die know why. >> because he was a good person. >> it is bothering me. i live a passionnal life. >> you do. >> but trump so the conservative party has been trying for a wail to lib care r tearians and hawks and he have gel cals everybody is all over the place and nobody
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likes anybody. they are saying it's funny when the guy says the thing about the wall. whenever he says build the wall build it quickly i laugh even though i know this all means we are in the end times. so -- >> it's not the end times. they are coming at you. >> seeds? cans of seeds. >> are you trying to put us out of business? oo is it possible that this is going to happen? this is going to happen. wither going to have a president trump. he could beat hillary. >> to be fair, if you are under indictment it is rather hard to win the presidency. the republicans have to choose carefully for two reasons. one hillary clinton will be much harder to be in a general election because he this all right staut off with 48 percent of the vote. he and donald trump score the same on two metrics in
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consistent number of polls. >> you know they told me i shouldn't come on the show. they told me not to come on to the show. >> do not applaud that joke. they told me i shouldn't come out on the show. they were right. they were right. they scored the same in two metric. >> you keep saying metrics. >> there is a lot of reasons. >> isn't that canadian? >> smell the syrup. smell the syrup. i was born in michigan which is dangerously close to canada, by the way. >> i am glad you asked. >> here's the problem. demographics 30 percent of the non white vote they would win. >> why is that a concern? >> because that's just the numbers. >> black guys love trump. they do seriously. >> what about hispanic.
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he's got a huge number of hispanics working for him. >> don't be so afraid of trump. >> vote for trump. >> i am a cruise gz guy. >> why? >> i am very religious. >> on that note. up next despite dressing like a benevolent space alien hillary clinton wins nevada. it's annual state. young voters flock to bernie the power of ex pacstaecstasy. why that scares me to my core. next. which allergy? eees. bees? eese. trees?
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>> some may have doubted but we never doubted each other. this one is for you. >> it is like a bottle of ketchup exploded. what is her obsession with dressing like condiments?
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she won and sanders lost. polls show sanders won 72 percent of voters over 45. that's scary. sander's resume is thinner than rubio's hair. he lived in a shack with little electricity. i understand the but they were not the 70's. bernie wrote born a-- porn and e good kind. have you read it? i have a dozen times. maybe more. it is politics. remember he is socialists he's lecturing america on success. if we listen to sanders in the 70's it would be far more poorer now than ever. the reduction in disease and death is due to our beliefs not his. compared to the mess it is now
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and repeated in venezuela. the left can't do that math. watching sanders do this is like catching cat do algebra. he thinks isis is a kid's show. oo 3,000 years later he dug up this lost treasure and found she was heir to the secrets of isis. >> good show. >> i am glad he lost. let's not forget hillary is stealing bernie's stick. she is skirting a bottle of nonsense all over the place. what a way to ruin a great meal a great meal that is not america. thank you. >> i want to>> hillary came up with this great idea to deal with all of the republican lies. >> one of my favorite political ads of all time was a radio ad rural arkansas where the
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announcer said wouldn't it be great if somebody running for office said something we could have an immediate reaction as to whether it was true or not? we trained this dog, and the dog if it is not true he is going to bark. i would love to see how we can do that with the republicans. we need to get that dog and follow him around every time they say these things. the great recession was caused by too much regulation. (barking) you know? >> i found that incredibly arousing. so much so that it came up with a little idea. whenever any one on the panel lies i do this. >> the bark button. >> i want to bring cat into this
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early. are you happy she beat bernie? >> no. i hate her. she is a walking nightmare. shoe stud still feel embarrassed because they was worried about bernie in the first place. unfortunately embarrassment is a human emotion. i don't think she has those. she is a robot and she malfunctions and starts barking tim sometimes. she is getting kind of old. she is old. >> that is not a problem. >> it is still true and she is probably uncomfortable with it. that's why i said it. >> we are are you inning our -- ruining our country already. >> wow. >> super delegates. okay. i don't understand super delegates. compared to delegates is that like charlie's angels like super delegates is farah fawcett and a regular delegate is cheryl
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tiegs? >> first of all you are wrong. the parties are allowed to pick whoever they want to be their nom naes -- nominees. i am either a republican nor a democrat. the democrats have super delegates. in the end the party establishment has free agents and they can swing in. >> they would get rid of trump. >> there would be 300 people at the convention at the end it would say, that john kasich is a charming young man. i have always enjoed his positions on medicare. >> so like hillary in new hampshire. she gets smoked 20 something points but wins the delegates. why go out and vote? >> shea deployed the humans who were part of the organization. >> they are no humans. >> she had what do we call them?
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she deployed these people who are retainers of her family for 30 years and then she said i have just lost a humiliating defeat now you declare your allegiance to me today. shy didn't win any delegates there but deployed those as she could. >> right and boring. so many young people think bernie's view is correct. they are sprunging off the greatest free market system in the history of the world. >> you nealed it. this is what i think is disturbing about this race. bernie sanders pulling from that young crowd. i think partly that is true but if you don't image yourself part of the american dream if you don't see yourself doing well working hard and trying to become wealthy, it will not
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fail. a lot of young people after search years of the current administration beating on them telling them they are victims and victims screwed they can't get ahead that plays well with them because they don't image themselves part of the drink. that is fundamentally a great problem to be part of the american dream. >> i always imaged myself -- >> you look like a dog. >> maybe you didn't see the results. >> bernie is a flight aiden tant's worse nightmare. he's the guy that puts the oxygen mask on his seat mate before himself. that's what socialism essentially is. >> bernie has 65,000 reportedly
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and credit card debt. how can you help the rest of us if you can't help yourself first. >> the cat has the visceral dislike for hillary the problem is bernie is actually very likeable. you know a great neighbor you can take stuff from him and determine it. >> he will never ask for the rake. >> bernie believes the government should be responsible for how the goods are used. >> that is not communism that's socialism. >> he's light socialism. >> i would drink that. >> you would drink anything. >> i like bernie because you know he still goes to the library. all of his books have that
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little cellophane protection. >> are you ready for hard hitting journalism? oo we will be reporting on a man named trump. rry bradshaw? rry bradshaw? what a surprise! you know what else is a surprise? shingles. and how it can hit you out of nowhere. i know. i had it. c'mon let's sit down and talk about it. and did you know that one in three people will get shingles? (all) no. that's why i'm reminding people if you had chickenpox then the shingles virus is already inside you. (all) oooh. who's had chickenpox? scoot over. and look that nasty rash can pop up anywhere and the pain can be even worse than it looks. talk to your doctor or pharmacist. about a vaccine that can help prevent shingles.
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roundup. the tweak of special donald trump edition. on wednesday pope francis or as i like to call him pope francis called out trump's plan to build a wall between the u.s. and mexico. >> they are building walls wherever they may be and not building bridges is not christian. this is not in the gospel. also i really enjoy the greg gutfeld show. >> who knew. thank you for holiness. trump fired back. >> if and when the vatican is attacked by isis which as everyone knows is isis ultimate trophy, i can promise you that the pope would have only wished and prayed that donald trump would have been president, because it's true. it's true. because this would not have
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happen happened>> it is amazing. joining me to discuss this and other stories is our' grieable core spon accident jerry. >> i heard you might be a little sick? >> not feeling well? >> no. >> you are catholic so you probably agree with the pope. >> no not just because i am catholic, greg, but because i believe in bridges. i love bridge. they are very important. if you are going to build wall you have to build bridges as well. >> should the pope be delving into american politics? >> i don't believe he should. there are walls around the vatican just as done in aed trump said and there's a big door in the big vatican wall just like the one donald trump wants to build. i think it is a mistake. why can't the pope change his mind? >> i agree. we should listen to him, greg. >> i don't like it when you mix religion with politics. >> they don't mix, greg. >> they don't.
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>> trump made news going after george w. bush after 9-11. is this a good idea going after bush? >> it is and that's why bush dropped yoout. >> it is disappointing. george w. bush is not running in the race so he shouldn't attack him. >> we love trump because he says what he thinks. >> what he said may have been wrong but he was right to say it. >> isn't saying the president lied is slander? >> it is slanderous and i think someone should stand up to done in aed trump. >> trump threatened to sue ted cruz after cruz ran an ad featuring a 99 clip where he calls him very pro choice. if cruz puts something out there not true doesn't a defamation lawsuit make sense? >> you should take someone to court, greg. just like doug lshg uellon out
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of your own hands. >> cruz says it is a frivolous suit. >> i thin frivolous and cruz will do well with the suit. >> if you were trump sue to protect your own name? >> he has the name to protect. the trump name is valuable so he should sue. >> it is not like he can sue isis when he is president. >> that is certainly not true. >> last story. >> thursday trump repeated criticism with the trade dealings with china. play it. >> china is taking so much of our money. it is one of the great thefts in the history of the world. $505 billion this year in a trade deficit. >> bashing kind gnaw. good idea? >> absolutely. they are eating our lunch. >> but jerry you have to admit a
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trade world would hurt the poor. >> did you ever go into wal-mart fantastic products we can't do well without china. >> wait. are you saying dashing china would be a good thing? >> bashing china is a good thing. we need china but we also have to bash them. >> as always you were very, very agreeable. >> thank you, greg. >> apple is refusing to let law enforcement have a look at san bernardino shooters phone are they injure wrists or they protect their privacy? i will free tend to answer the question while thinking about my drinking plans for later. >> if you will will be in the new york area and would like to be part of our audience e-mail greg is the o combine a safe sleep aid plus
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>> is apple full of crapple. an iphone was found in the vehicle of the san bernardino terrorist. they think it could have key information so the court ruled apple must give assistant to kill the data erasing feature that kicks in after 10 failed attempts. lift that you could apply unlimited pass codes to answer the phone. i am already confused because i was a english major. once they allow this it could allow access to any phone. they will not do it. we could find no precedent for an american company to expose customers to greater risk of attack. on friday they had a motion to compel apple to apply. while they were doing that i decided to do this. >> how hard is it really to open
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an iphone. let's find out. my handy goggles take them wherever i go. i did add dull films. hammer, coffee. >> hold on a second. . nothing there. that sucks. this phone cost me $500. hard hitting journalism right there. cat you are the so-called libertarian ie you have no power in this world. you want to continue enjoying encrypted phones.
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>> people are criticizing apple a lot on this saying it's a marketing ploy they don't care about our civil liberties. the motivation doesn't really matter to me. when a guy wants to come up and buy me a drink at the bar i know his motivation is disgusting but i do want that whiskey. so i will just say okay that's good. there's one thing i care about more than risky is my civil liberties. this is what is america. if they won't be able to do this to every phone it is naive to think it is one phone. once the technology is out there it is out there. you are not having enough fun with your phone. >> wow. >> mike what she is saying is that you don't have good stuff on your phone so it doesn't matter. >> yeah. >> and that sucks. >> all right. >> let the govrp no me explain
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this as i can. despite the self righteous crap these conversations are important. i am not going to deny that. you have to have conversations about where the pendulum swings. security on the other side. always trying to calibrate. here's the deal. the fbi went to apple they get the phone. they know for a fact there are dozens and dozens. they had lots and lots of conversations with them. apple kept saying fu. they got the data off the cloud. the last time it was up loaded is october. you have a couple of months of data on there. if you read the court order. they said this before they had this. they said this you take the phone you keep it on your apple facility. you just force the phone and destroy it just destroy it but give us the text off this phone. give us the texts off this.
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it has turned into this bureau that wants to create a system, the back door to all of the devices. read the court order keep it on the facility create a file and give us the text. >> maybe the fbi should try harder. they are not saying they can't do it. the phone doesn't belong to apple they just made the phone. fbi can try hard to do it. though doo a right to force that. >> (talking over one another) >> i never believed the whole santa claus thing. (barking) >> intelligent argument. >> you got to have cooperation. you have to have the cooperat n cooperation>> wow. wow. >> shot it down by cat.
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>> the place to fight the issues is in the court process and through the legislation that is designed parameters by the people's representatives and the warrant system. now you have technology companies saying you don't know about the courts and legislation and the warrants. we know best. >> did you hear that? you are treating this like pass words. >> if this phone contained information about a bombing that would occur at apple cook would feel differently, right, nick? >> civil rights, right? >> civil rights doesn't matter if you don't have a country. security already wins out. >> i agree. joe can someone help me get into my e-mails? >> apple has created their narrative. it is a market ploy. we like to have market supply. everyone says they like apple
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for doing this. trump has boycotted apple. trump is telling everyone to boycott. america listens to trump. >> it is a trump cot. >> by the way the most dangerous foul scene in the history of the world is freedom verses security. they aren't opposed. they compliment each other. you can't have freedom without security. this is a lie created to the benjamin franklin quote that is being miss applied. miss applied. >> there is a trade-off between security and privacy. >> privacy is different than freedom. it is about civil liberties. >> i always leave my drapes open because i don't care. this year you have another reason for the oscars. it's on opposite this very show. joe ann and cat have to plan to try to boycott the event. were they successful? probably not. stick around.
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>>ed acat me awards are on sunday. we will see what lamp shade
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johnny depp will look like this year. the oscars are on the exact same time adds this show our show next week. so i told our very own joanna notch shky to see if they can come up with a remedy. >> watching the ott cars is like getting a colon no, sir c -- co it's long and has cameras. are you going to watch the oscars? >> no. not at all. >> are you going to be watching the greg gutfeld show, is that why? >> no. >> are you going to be watching the oscars this year. >> yes. >> that's the wro ng answer. if you could do it again for me one more time and say no. right. are you going to be watching the oscars this year? >> no. >> terrific. >> i am actually going to the oscars. >> you should watch the greg gutfeld show instead. >> have you ever seen leonardo
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dicaprio? >> of course. >> he looks nothing like that. >> do you want to live in a world where meryl streep has been snubbed from the nomination. >> no. >> you know who is nominated leonardo dicaprio. he has never won one before should he with inthis year? him. think so. >> really? are you guys friends? >> then you shouldn't care. so are you going to watch the oscars? >> hell yes. >> really? how c how can you do that after the way happy gilmore was snubd in 97. >> will you watching the oscars this year? >> maybe we shouldn't. the idea of a red carpet that is kind of elitist isn't it? >> no. >> think about this why do people wear shoes on the carpet? >> for girls this he need high heels, no?
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>> isn't that awful. we are feminine. it is a huge thing. we don't need to wear shoes to look hot. >> in a way it makes sense. >> i am going to go now. >> what would your award sound like if you won an oscar? >> if i won an oscar i want to thank god my supporters, houston texas, lansing, michigan, we are on the map. >> that's great. you practiced this. >> if i give you a prize will you promise not to watch the oscars? >> the prize is this magic mike xxldvd. >> i will take the dvd. >> trick question. i am never parting with it. >> it is not actually magic mike xxl. i got it from the guy on the subway. >> are you going to watch the oscars. >> you are going to be watching the greg gutfeld show? >> no.
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>> is the greg gutfeld show your favorite show? >> yes, yes, yes. >> i would like to point out to everyone in the audience if there was no times square there wouldn't be man on the streets on any show. people who work in television are too lazy to go anywhere else. >> it is a block away. >> it is still pretty far. cold sometimes. >> coming up, meet your studio audience, they are all nude. staying in rhythm...
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padvil pm gives you the healingu at nsleep you need, it. helping you fall asleep and stay asleep so your body can heal as you rest. advil pm. for a healing night's sleep. >> welcome back to american bandstand. i am dick clark. last week we introduced a live
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audience. a lot of people didn't believe it. they thought it was a laugh track. there was so much laughter it couldn't possibly be real. i wanted to show you these are actually real people made of real flesh. you are real. >> i am for real. >> some shows give away gifts to the audience and i know -- i have>> i have some dip see doodles. they did not come from the second floor vending machine. >> that's griet. glad you have these on stock. >> just for you. >> don't eat them all in one place. >> how did you enjoy the show? >> excellent. >> you like the show? >> it was very good. >> you are not just saying that because you are looking at the back of my head? people say the strangest things when they are looking at the back of my head. i will let that sit.
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sour dough nibblelers and we have cheese nips over there. there you go. wow. you are not shy about your anybody lets are you? where are you -- where are you from? >> did you come here for the show? >> what does dc stand for? >> district of columbia. >> very good. you win a car. you win absolutely nothing. who was your favorite guest tonight? >> i would say joanne. >> why do you say that? >> always great. always fun to watch on the show. >> nothing to do with what she says? >> no more about the drunken quality. >> about the what? >> more about the drunken quality. >> she is constantly inebriated. >> she has no idea what it is like to be sober. >> on that note we have a quick program reminder. you will want to watch us. sunday 10:00 p.m. eastern time i
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want to thank the guest chris star walls whose career is over. nick depalo. cia mike baker. joanne and katherine. i am greg gutfeld. i love you america. anchored by bai baier, next. we are going to make america so great again. maybe greater than ever before. >> the political establishment has been taking a thrashing. >> that is not what democracy is about. that is what oligarchy is about! >> and the voters are taking over. >> you need to make me speak or i will shut it down. get out of my face. >> what i learned about hillary, she's very corrupt and she lies a lot. and that's it. we're done. >> this hour, we'll look at how people are speaking out. i'm gay. and i support trump. >> i don't want to have a beer with the president. i want


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