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tv   Red Eye With Tom Shillue  FOX News  September 3, 2016 11:00pm-12:01am PDT

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well, that is it. i hope you've enjoyed this special election edition of "watters' world." don't forget to follow me on welcome to "red eye." i'm tom shillue. let's check in with andy levey at the tease deck. andy? >> coming up on the big show. it has been a big week for donald trump who somehow finds the time to leave us a huge voicemail. plus, cocaine babes. enough said, true believers. and a new study reveals dogs can understand what you are saying and even worse, i'm pretty sure they are telling the government. back to you, tom. >> thank you, andy. let's welcome our guests. she is the best thing to come from ohio since the light bulb. he co under toed -- co founded
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tea party 360. from serious xm, david webb. he is too humble so i have to say it for him. you're welcome, america. fox news contributor, rob o'neil. and he has the charisma of an emo basist. next to me, comedian dave smith. let's start the show. wednesday was a busy day for donald trump. the gop presidential nominee met with the mexican president enrique pena-nieto. he demonstrated how to legally cross the border. as you know he has been on "red eye" in the past. i called him yesterday, but he was too busy to appear on the show. he left me a message updating me on the trip.
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have a listen. >> tom, i'm very, very happy to report that i am now bilateral. i am calling you from mexico. it is an international country here i am here at the casa blanca. that's mexican for house white. now instead of white house it is house white. they put the adjective after the noun. it seems backwards, but i have to tell you it is very, very charming to be honest. anyway, i was invited here by mexican president, president pena-pasta. a good man. my amigo, we shared real mexican food, tom, real mexican food like quasadilla and umpa-loompas. and a taco bowl, the best taco bowl in new york city.
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i like to think it is the best in the entire country. i told him, i said president pena-primavera, you have to stop sending us your illegals your macarenas. are you listening? i have to tell you, tom, he didn't say much. i don't think he understands american, frankly. i really think the meeting went fantastically well. unfortunately i had to get on a plane and get back here and beacon cussed -- be concussed. i would like to come back on your show, but you have to tell andy to be nicer to me. he is not being nice. in pack, he is being very -- in fact, he is being very, very mean. i think you are doing a great job, tom. you are doing a great job.
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him, not so much. i don't appreciate that. >> my thanks to mr. trump for that report. after mexico trump flew to arizona where he gave a speech on immigration. until wednesday night trump was quiet on his thoughts on immigration. in phoenix he finally opened up. >> anyone who has entered the united states illegally is subject to deportation. >> people will know that you can't just smuggle in, hunker down and wait to be legalized. >> trump said undocumented immigrants must leave and have re-entry and they will be subject to i'd logical tests. >> it is our right as a sovereign nation to choose immigrants that we think are the likeliest to thrive and flourish and love us. >> i like that. and love us. trump introduced a new proposal to the immigration
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plan. >> we will build a great wall along the southern border. >> i have heard that before. i think he said it before. the media said there are two trumps on wednesday. >> two trumps on display. the plight diplomat and the uncompromising advocate. >> a lot of adjectives there. >> are there really two donald trumps? >> i think there are two donald trumps. i think there is one donald trump. >> they seem to have gotten together on this. there are two trumps and what happened to the trump, the diplomatic trump. this is what happens when you play it on foreign countries?
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you play nice? he didn't expect trump to say yes. why would you challenge a guy with his own plane that can show up. >> you thought he was going to -- i don't think he will be there at all. he steals the show and they are going why, dude? trump wins a day. if they win they will be four clintons. politicians do what they need to do. they give a great speech and people can try to attack it, but they are points of life. >> what do you think? this is what happens. ambassador bolton says this is what you have to do. it is called diplomacy. you come back and you speak to the domestic audience.
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>> you lie through your teeth? >> that's what politics is. >> he didn't change his policy. he didn't go forget the wall. he went down andy said -- who knows what he said. >> he took the xanax and it wore off and then he got to phoenix. >> he doesn't drink and he doesn't do any drugs. >> ann coulter was even saying i have to cut my book tour short. >> last week -- >> he has been on both sides of every issue. he donated to hillary clinton. >> he said he was playing the game. last week he used the word softening and ann coulter doesn't like that word. a lot of people got worried. this week there has been no change. was there any change in policy? i don't think there was. >> if the change is they said something that contridicted something that they said
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earlier that day, that's the same as it it has been the whole time. >> he stressed different words wrong. >> we are going to get them out there and come back legally and they will love us. i am not sure -- >> there is a door in the wall. >> maybe he took a xanax. there is only one trump. >> everyone is reacting as if he is so rad -- radical. he came out and there was a nasty speech. but really what is our immigration policy? >> he went to mexico and he said we have a law and you intoed to start a relationship in the negotiation. we did it overseas. we didn't call them a negotiation. we didn't start water boarding. >> you may have started with a hi, how are you?
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by the way, we have water boarding. >> you have to give them the options. >> donald trump went down there and did what he did will he is a major candidate of a major party and he played that role. and then he gives a speech and expands five points to 10 points with consistency. we can joke about it, but if you read the policys and the proposals those laws are on the books. we need to enforce them. for anybody who thinks they are draw cone yen read mexico's laws. >> we don't want to emulate anything about mexico. >> i am with you. i think this is a good moment for trump. he look presidential. by the way, flip-flopping on an issue in one day, that's pretty presidential. that's what politicians do. hillary has done this a bunch. i agree with you on that. >> kyle, i know you are a huge trump fan. what do you think -- >> huge! >> what do you think in the
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past few days? >> i think he is soft in mexico, presidential and he went completely jekyle and hy de. he will get rid of the mexicans and the chipotles. if you want your guac, get it now. it will be gone soon. >> i thought you were coming down on the side of chipotle. >> not a fan of chipotle. you like your guac fresh made? >> i pay extra for it. >> look, i know it is extra. >> there are some people that wear shirts and it offends people. >> check out this tree on biden's official twittering. trump was born with a silver spoon in his mouth and said he is now choking because his foot is in his mouth along with the spoon.
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>> he got that all in 140 characters? he nailed trump, didn't he? he is clearly a master, but we thought we would suggest more burns for him to use on twitter. you can't judge a book by its cover. with trump you can. it is not a book i would buy. good luck with that. trump's been on the gravy train his whole life, but the conductor is coming around checking tickets. trump has no tickets and we don't accept cash on the train so it is about to be his last stop on the gravy train. what do you think? joe biden, he is a funny guy. >> very talented joke writer. just as a stand up comedian, doesn't that tweet drive you crazy? you could have made that a funny joke if trump was born with a silver spoon in his mouth. his mouth is now occupied by his foot. >> wait a minute.
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are you a professional twitter editor? >> no, but if biden wants to hire me. >> maybe if we candy heat -- can delete that tweet. >> he signed it vp biden. he wanted people to know it didn't come with assistance. >> they were on the campaign trail and said there was a big market crash. roosevelt got on tv. >> come on. >> let me tell you a little something. >> it was a nice old story. >> that's how confident she was. she went, yep, yep. >> do you see katie couric. >> she was on tv in 1929. >> i'm sorry. that was brian williams reporting. as far as biden, come on, let's talk about biden here.
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we will put y'all in chains or maybe if there is a trump book as you suggested you can't buy it in the store or how about you go out on your -- i love my favorite one. when there is somebody an armed robber go out on the porch and fire two blasts from the shotgun. now your gun is empty and you hope the robber is not ours. >> that's the thing about the new gun policy is we can now use our guns as bats. >> it is going to be hot and you won't be able to hold on to it. >> i wish he was going to be around for the next eight years. >> i really do. he is so sweet. who can be mad at him? >> it is ironic that he did the foot in the mouth thing. i wonder if obama commits elder abuse with him. he is like the sweet mentally
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ill relative that they pick up from the senior center and warns the family that he can't be on stand by. >> it always comes down to which candidate you want to have a beer with and i would love to have a beer with him. you know he is ordering a shot. >> moving on. after brazil ryan lochte lost endorsements from speedo, ralph lauren and the gentle laser hair removal system. as they say if you fall off the horse, get back in the pool. they -- he will be on dancing with the stars this fall and now he has a new deal which he announced in an instagram post on tuesday. >> i have been traveling a lot lately. we all like to have fun. but it is a good idea to stay safe.
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i don't go anywhere without robocop. it is a tiny device. all you do is pull the pin and it releases a startling alarm that can get you out of a bad situation. >> so natural, wasn't it? >> can i just say honestly for the whole country thank god bin laden didn't have one of those. it may have been a different story. >> i think ryan lochte endorsing something like that is like o.j. simpson endorsing a burglar alarm. >> or a knife company. >> a spokeswoman for robocop says they partnered with lochte because he is and will likely be the best swimmer this country has produced. >> david, what do you theng ryan lochte -- i think -- i commend the guy. he is coming back and this is how you do it. >> that's right. this is america and this is capitalism. if michael vick can come back,
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so can ryan lochte. >> michael vick did something wrong. they shook him down and -- in rio and he told a little white lie to go along. >> he is the worst thing since the invention of the burrito. that's pretty much it. >> drops the mic. >> kyle, i think it is a good move for this company. i never heard them before and now we are talking about them. >> he delivered that speech with about as much enthusiasm as a robocop. it was as if he was reading ofl the cue -- reading off the cue card. >> something. and also it is like i don't get the sound like it is supposed to protect you. >> if you pull in the wrong neighborhood it just tells the other criminals where you are. is this robocop one or two.
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>> dave, i think it is a good product. >> i am talking about robocop the product. >> i mean, i guess. the noise didn't seem like it was actually going to repel an aggressive person. the point is true. it is capitalism and it is interesting how the company responds to the market so quickly. everyone was furious a few weeks ago and then the sponsors dropped them. maybe we rushed the judgment on that and then the the the companies start signing them. >> all press is good press and everyone knows who ryan lochte is. if he wins a gold it is a good story. >> don't you think the people -- it was a little too heavy. >> i was one of those people. i think i came down on him too heavy. you first heard the story and it was easy it is like they
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trashed a guy's bar. then you remember the life old lesson, never trust the brazilian cops. my grandpa used to always tell me. >> even the fake cops. coming up, what did these two young women smuggle into australia? if i had to guess, i would say drugs.i'm patricia stark.
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now back to "red eye." >> i love to travel the world, and when i do i like to share my experiences on social media. there is me doing something somewhere in the world. looks like fun, huh? i often give travel tips to others too like these two young ladies, isabel and melina who recently sailed around the world on a princess
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cruise. tip one, bring the sunscreen. it is much stronger in the southern hemisphere and if you are not careful you will end up with a nasty burn. i for one don't go out without a tube of zinc. tip two, always try to sample the local culture. here they are drinking from a coconut. that's fantastic. >> where is the straw? >> tip three, travel light. let's look at their luggage. do you see that? way too much cocaine. they caught them with 77 pounds in their suitcase. that's excessive even for two people. if you need a pick me up, go for an espresso. i can ask for a cup of coffee in 10 languages. now in addition to cutting short their vacation, these two ladies face life sentences. it is a big travel no, no.
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>> david, you know not to do this, don't you? >> to be fair, the australian out back is really big. if you want to get across it, you may need to stay away from the drive. >> so just for the australian leg of the trip. >> they wanted to experience australia and in order to get across the out back, you have to be awake and it is a long drive and there are roads and it happens. you don't want to run into an ab ridge knee -- an aborigane. >> we ought to let them off. they seem cute. >> so this is my problem with the story. the media, all they are doing is posting media babes there was also a 63-year-old man involved. where is he? >> it doesn't work on the screen. >> and a man with two bikini
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babes? thumbs up, dude. >> and you can see the pictures of them with the coconuts. i wanted to be like, um, you have cocaine in your bag. >> exactly. >> i think the 67-year-old guy wanted to drink out of a water coconut. in my experience that's how the guys get the girls on the boat. >> they used to say a lot of sophisticated things. let's date them. >> you have done a lot of traveling. it is usually in the service of your country. >> bear hands barely. >> but do you think these women might have been roped into it by these nefarious gentlemen? >> i would be willing to bet their jobs at hooters didn't pay for the -- >> they could be medical school students. you never know.
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>> there could be a paper in this. it could have been sponsored. >> they are just trying to get money to get their kid back. >> i think they -- the reason they caught them was there was a suspicious pairing. you had these two beautiful ladies and then this older guy. his suitcase was even bigger. he had like 177 pound in his suitcase. we have to look into this guy. >> who made the point that there was no straw? can we see that picture again? if you think a -- if you see a coconut drink with a straw, that's cute. if you take it without a straw it looks like she bit the top of the coconut off like she is some type of monster or something. what happened? >> where is the straw? >> they may not be having coconut drinks. she may be having a coconut.
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>> as the token libertarian here, this is actually a horrible thing if they are putting them in jail for life. >> guys, a lot do coke than pretend to. i bet a lot of people have jobs. only a government would look at hot chicks who want to party and say let's throw them in jail for life. the rest of them were like, jackpot. >> but the thing is, this really is international drug trade. it is a big deal. >> what do they call it, a clinical amount of cocaine? >> someone has to get in trouble for it and it is these beautiful ladies. >> let them out. >> what is really sad is a 67-year-old guy will die shortly in jail and they have a long way to go. they are really getting the raw end of the deal.
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>> coming up, he has more venom than a cobra and he is charmed by perfect flute playing. half time with andy levey is back. subscribe on i tunes and
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welcome back. time to find out what we got wrong and what we missed by andy levey.
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>> you introduced kyle as the best thing since the light bulb. even thomas edison born in ohio invented the light bulb and it was in menlo park, new jersey. >> he thought about it when he was a kid. >> i don't believe he did. >> also everything he did was a big lie anyway. >> you are one of those anti-edison guys if. >> never edison. >> exactly. never tom. it is people familied tom. there is something about them. trump's immigration speech. you said trump went down to mexico and did what he was supposed to do and then he came back here and gave a fiery speech. everyone on the panel seemed to agree he was presidential in mexico. what does that mean? >> it means he didn't insult anybody. >> no, seriously he was presidential and he was on the stage and he was representing
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america as a potential president well. he looked good. you have to look the role. >> did he bow to the mexican president? >> i don't believe he did. >> he did not act presidential. >> that's the current president. >> excuse me. >> dave, tom said this is what you do. you say one nick when you are visiting abroad. you said you lie through your teeth in one of those. can't it be in both of those? >> i was giving him the benefit of the doubt. i like to think one of the two donald trumps is honest. >> which one? >> the second. >> you said what happened took a xanax and it wore off by nighttime. i actually agree with that. i think clog -- klonapin. >> he didn't eat anyone's face-off. wait, that's ambien. >> there are a lot of drugs on this show tonight.
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>> it is thursday night, man. >> i didn't know. i'm just a throw back and not a throw down. >> you said he went to mexico to start a relationship. does melania know about this? >> i was being serious. he is someone who has built a lot of stuff. he has an airplane with his name on it. i think he was being sincere. he came back to phoenix and let his hair down. >> not literally. i don't think he can. i would like to see that though. biden's burn. you said as a stand up comedian the tweet drove you nuts. >> it sounded like it was a mother goose movie. >> trimming the fat -- it is like if martin luther king was
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like, i had a dream. you have to hit the punch. >> that silver spoon thing doesn't work for trump. >> that's not the way you think of them. >> don't tell me how you think of them. >> you made a good point about biden being the last to put one's foot in one's mouth. or a hand on his shoulder. >> he was sworn in as the secretary of defense and he was about to do a gropy, groperson. he doesn't seem violent or capable so that's cool. >> that's what you want in a vice president. >> that's what he is supposed to do. he shows up, hey, i'm the vice president. >> david, rob said the good thing about the gun policy is you can use your gun as a bat. you said make sure to not hold it at the business end because it gets hot. i thought it was nice to give gun pointers to the guy who
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killed bin laden. >> it works. >> i like how he said always grab had gun by the -- wood? >> i was going to say bow. >> ryan lochte's new endorsement. after watching the video you said "so natural." >> yeah. >> what scares me about watching that is that was the best take. >> i know. the best part was the expression he made. he is a funny guy, but has trouble with the scripted material. >> they shouldn't have had him read prompter. you said lochte is the worst thing to happen to the bathroom after the burrito. >> do that and destroy the bathroom. it was blown way out of proportion. he admitted it and tore stuff down and lied to cops, who hasn't done that? and then he went home really fast. he may qualify for some other
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olympic teams the way he went through the metal detector. >> you have done a few things in your life. >> try to keep a positive outlook on everything. >> did andy spend time fact checking where a burrito originated? >> that's his job. >> that's kind of my job. >> if you're just gonna bag on my job, that's not cool. have i kids to feed. >> burritos. >> exactly. dave, you said the robocop doesn't sound loud enough to repel an attacker. i think it is louder than it sounded on the crappy video. >> what person poses a menacing threat to you and then is like, ew, noise! >> they have something in yellowstone park where you can get rid of the bears with a bear bell. the bears just know it is dinner time. if -- so they say if you want to find a bear bell look in a
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pile of bear [bleep]. >> you ask if this is robocop one or two. i am curious to see if it is a trademark violation. they added a second p to robocop so how is that okay? >> i think it is just a double negative. >> i don't know what that means. >> i got the look out of him. >> cocaine babes, you called the 77 pounds too much even for two people. >> yes. >> first of all, judgmental much? what would you consider the correct amount of cocaine for two people? if you don't know why are they seeing seven pounds is too much. >> i have seen the cocaine. they do lines. i don't think they do the whole bag. >> kyle, you said your problem with the story is that the media is focusing on the two bikini babes and there was a 63-year-old man involved.
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i don't think you understand how the media works. >> i am not saying i wanted to see him either. it is just an interesting observation. >> the 63-year-old man is not telegenetic. >> you said they are just trying to get their kids back. >> start a better life for themselves. >> now the australian government will throw him in jail for life. a tyrannical third world country. >> i am done. coming up -- thank you, andy -- are people stealing medications from their pets? that sounds like something people would do. i wanted to know who i am and where i came from. i did my ancestrydna and i couldn't wait to get my pie chart.
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the most shocking result was that i'm 26% native american. i had no idea. just to know this is what i'm made of, this is where my ancestors came from. and i absolutely want to know more about my native american heritage. it's opened up a whole new world for me. discover the story only your dna can tell. order your kit now at
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stark. now back to "red eye." you pay for your dog's medication. why should he get all of it? scientists discovered that some people are taking medsment -- meds meant for their pets. 4% of adults steal from their pet's stash. 4% may sound low, but consider that stealing pet medication wasn't even a choice in the survey. people had to write it in. the true number may be higher. i think it is as high as
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100%. in other dog news, a study found man's best friend really does understand what we are saying somewhat. by scanning their brain researchers found dogs processed words and vocal pitch the same way humans do. basically if you are stealing your dog's meds, don't tell them about it. kyle, what do you think? they said 4%. obviously i think the number is higher. >> unless someone has a horse and they are stealing special k -- >> great idea. >> why steal things prescribed to your cat or dog? >> it is interesting. you talked about the drug references and now we are doing another drug segment. >> i am getting the theme here if nothing else. >> does it surprise you that people -- i mean this is what happens. where there are drugs people will get their hands on them. >> when you think about it what does your dog do?
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slobbers on you. what does grandma do? slobbers on you. it is a natural progression. >> do they steal from old people? >> oh yeah the grandkids go to school with grandmas and grandpas and they take a little extra out. now you are taking it from rover. >> >> it cures your fleas. >> the ketamine is for horses and people found a way to enjoy that, right? >> how does the dog feel about the drug? has anybody done that study? >> they don't like it. >> give them 77 pounds and maybe they can get through customs. >> dogs can understand people. we brought them on the bin laden mission. they are there for their nose and sense of anything. they can basically sit on the door and tell you if there are
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explosives and it is ready to blow up jievment they were in the compound? >> they take them off their leash and they follow lasers that listen to commands. i had a dog going up the set of stairs in front of me and you don't feel quite right. the dog went ahead of me and he turned to the secret wall. he cleared the room. >> you know what i like about some of these dogs? the titanium bites, these are really cool dogs. some are equipped. >> they have titanium teeth. >> we hear stories about that and our dog is dead now, but he only had one. he was there to smell. >> i could talk about the hero dogs. >> beat that. >> a little story of how we
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killed bin laden. here is something i wrote down an hour ago. >> i got one too. >> what does a dog do on liberty? >> i am just glad the other side doesn't have dogs working for them. like his dog didn't have to run into a dog with a turbine. >> enemy dogs. >> there were dogs barking. i am convinced dogs continually bark in that part of the world. the dogs we have wouldn't pay them any mind. wouldn't care. >>
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coming up tomorrow on the next "red eye" kevin downey, junior, dear draw bolton and pat kemp. >> the dmv in california is cracking down on vanity license plates they deem offensive. sf put together a slide show of rejected plates. among them, datas. this one clearly says
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koke2big. and next, milftaxi. hey, you need a ride. andy4h street? i don't get it. >> some of these are pretty dirty. >> i think if you have a license plate that says milf, that's self-proclaimed. let somebody else call you a milf and don't brag and put it on the back of the taxi. >> maybe her son got it for her. >> happy mother's day. here is your plate. >> that would be a weird relationship. >> i think we should get off the drugs and talk about incest. >> it is not incest. the son got it and he knows what his mom is all about. >> there was a coke one. coke 2 sweet i thought maybe they took it to australia.
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>> i don't think it was coke. it was something 2 big. >> dave, you are a libertarian and you want them to write any dirty nonsense they want i bet. >> i don't want them to write dirty nonsense. i don't want them to go to jail for doing it either. there is a middle ground. do you know how much more important the government of california can do to fix the failed state? you don't care about the children. >> the government shouldn't be involved in nonviolent activities. if somebody is doing something violent go and get them. >> what do you think? >> i was a little disturbed. i didn't know my friend's mom was parking in front of the house. >> would you take a shot of
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that, please? >> this is a great way to end the show, guys. we have to elevate. that does it for me, tom shillue.
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hi, i'm greg gutfeld. tough on grease, soft on hands. here's what's coming up. trump's trip to mexico. how did it go? more presidential, less unpresidential? sorry, same thing. she gives weiner the heave-ho. what took her so long? and mean-looking mascots. are they terrifying college students? one professor says yes. we challenge that theory in a bee costume. let's get started, america. it is chipotle and it's now a race against time.


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