tv Late Night With Seth Meyers NBC February 1, 2016 11:37pm-12:37am CST
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>> jimmy: his big new movie, "ride along 2," is in theaters this f fday. go see "ride along 2." we're about to play a game called "drinko." kevin, you requested we play drinko. >> yes. >> jimmy: why is that? >> because you'r'rnot good at it. you're not good at drinko. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm not good at this game. >> and i was le, "if i lose, what's the big deal?@ i get to4drink for free." [ laughter ] either way, there's no l ling right now. >> jimmy: okay, very good. drinko, would you like to explain how this works? >> yes, mr. hart, mr. fallon. welcome to drinko. in this game, the two of pick turns climbing my stairs and dropping two of your colored discs into the drinko board. then the disc clink down and land in these plastic cups, containing some of my favorite beverages such as capri sun, mulled wine, and pea -- >> i'm s sry, what? [ laughter ] >> soup. >> what was that? >> pea soup. they must drink a cocktail of the two chosen drinks. >> jimmy: okay, very good. ththk you, drinko. kevin, you're our guest. why don't you climb up there
>> pretty easy for me to climb the e airs in my cross training sneakers -- [ cheers and applause ] yeah, yeah. >> all right. >> now drop your first disc, [ cheers ] >> jimmymyall right, here we go. come on, pea soup. come on, pea soup. [ cheers ] >> now your second drink. >> jimmy: mulled wine is, like, all sorts of, like, cinnamon sticks and herbs and things. [ laughter ] >> i tell you off the bat, cinnamon sticks give me gas. [ laughter ] so you got to deal with that on your own time. >> drop it. >> jimmy: can i get this out of the way? it's all right. thank you, drinko. >> there you go. >> jimmy: how you doing, buddy? >> not good. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: not good. >> here we go. >> jimmy: there it goes. you'll be drinking mulled wine and hennessey. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, drinko. >> thakills me. how the black guy somehow
okay, all right. okay. >> jimmy: it's all random. >> it's all randam, okay, black guy. what's next? you have colol45? [ lauguger ] >> jimmy: come on. >> pour it in there, right? >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> i pour them both in there? >> jimmy: yeah. >> all right.. >> glug, glug, glug. >> i got to drink the whole thing? >> jimmy: i think so, yeah. [ cheers ] >> what's your problem? [ cheers ] >> jimmy: good to have you own show. congratulations on everything. let's do this again. [ crowd chants ] [ cheers ] [ laughter ] don'l move. don't moveve don't move. don't move. >> is this your turn? mount me. [ laughter ] ascend the staircase.
>> and drop two discs. ooh, ah. >> jimmy: all right. >> drop it. >> jimmy: how you feeling? all right. well, i'm going to go over to this one. no, no, no. not pea soup, not pea soup. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. pickle juice! >> jimmy: pickle juice! >> pickle juice! pickle -- pickle juice is big. >> jimmy: you put pickle juice on there. >> i got it, drinko. >> you're welcome. >> thank you, drinko. >> nice shoes. >> hey, thank you, drinko. >> hey, no problem. you look good in blue. drop it, james. >> pea soup, pea soup, pea soup! [ audience chants ] oh, oh! >> jimmy: nonono, no, no! please, no. what is it? >> capri sun. >> jimmy: yes! capri sun and pickle juice. that's my diet.
that's my diet i've been on. yeah. capri sun and pickle juice. >> mmm, so delicious. >> jimmy: that is so white guy. >> that looks like champagne. >> jimmy: it does, that's pickle juice? >> yes. >> that don'look good. even though he said that's capri sun, after seeing that, i don't believe it.. [ laughter ] i don't believe it one bit. >> jimmy: all right, this looks gross. [ cheers ] [ audience chants ] [ cheers and applause ] okay. >> not too shabby, james. now, for the final round, both of you fellows are going to mount me at t e same time, drop a disc into me simultaneously. [ laughter ] whoever's disc lands in the cup first wins, and the loser has to combine both stuffs and drink the finacocktail.
goin throw up all over the place. >> he said the first one -- >> jimmy: that goes in. >> wins. the other fellll drinks it. >> okay, so whoever's disc gets down first? >> does not have to drink the beverages. >> i got it. >> your shoes are so light. >> no wonder why i beaeayou up here. it's because of my cross trainers. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> ready, gentlemen? when i say, "three," drop your discs. onon two, three. at is it? [ cheers ] >> capri sun and tang. drink, drink! >> jimmy: what is it? >> capri sun and tanan you drink it! >> jimmy: capri sun and tang? >> no, no, no! it's killing me how the black guy got hennessey! [ laughter ] he's getting all types of juice. >> jimmy: you're the champ! here we go. >> kevin wins! >> jimmy: here you go! tang and capri sun! >> what? >> jimmy: you're the best.
>> i should have known it was rigged when i saw the white glove. i should have known. [ laughter ] [ drumroll ] yeah, yeah. [ cheers ] >> what did you have for breakfast? >> actually, don't do it. don't do it, brother. [ cheers ] >> jimmy: i'll do a sip. >> brother -- jimmy: i'll just do a sip. >> you got to drink that at the bottom. if you're going to do it, do it. [ audience chants ] [ cheers and applause ] >> drinko! >> jimmy: not bad, actuauay. not too shabby. >> oh, god! >> jimmy: hey, nike, if you're watching, i'd like my own sneakers as well. [ laughter ] i really deserve it. oh, my gosh. i'm the winner? no, i'm the loser. kevin hart is the champ, right
rocket hey there, tiny... what beer we drinkin'? i don't know boss... what about that redd's apple ale? you'u' a genius, tiny! this apple sauce is the bee's knees. the cat's pajamas! hits ya right in the kisser! emm. redd's apple ale. also in strawberry and green apple. we brought you here today to get your honest opinion about this new car. to keep things unbiased, we removed all the logos. feels like a bmw. reminds me a little bit of like an audi. so, this car supports apple carplay. siri, open maps. she gets me. wow. it also has teen driver technology. it even mutes the radio until the seat belts are buckled. i'm very curious what it is. this is the 2016 chevy malibu. and it sells for? it starts at twenty-two five. what? oh wow. i mean with all this technology.
[ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my next guest is one half of the very successful and very funny award-winning comedy duo, "the mighty boooo." in march, he'll embark on his first solo north american tour called, "an evening with noel fielding." look at this, the front. and here's the back, the back of his hair. [ laughter ] please welcome noel fielding, everybody. [ cheers and applause ]
welcome, please. oh, yeah. wherever you would like to sit. please. [ cheers ] welcome to this prprram. thank you so mucucfor coming on. >> i'm excited. >> jimmy: oh yeah, good. television. >> jimmy: yeah! >> i can't believe it. it's like "poltergeist." i've been sucked throughgh [ lauguger ] >> jimmy: you're part of it now, absolutely. maybe one day, you'll see yourself. >> in real life, your eyes are like a sort of beautiful doll's eyes. [ laughter ] i might have to lick them in a a minute. >> jimmy: yeah, i know. it happens. it happens to the best of us, yeah. the last time you were on the show, we did a thing through skype. >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: it was the mighty boosh. it was you and julian, then. >> yeah, julian. >> jimmy: we played -- it was a a mighty boosh app that we bet on. the whole app, it's a great app. but it's one thing in the app that is basically a coin flip. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and you guys lost. >> really? we can see it cut out at that moment. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i know. we bet $10 american dollars, i think. >> i know. i didn't have any money, so i painted you a painting of $10
[ laughter ] >> jimmy: you did? >> yeah. >> jimmy: this is not what a a $10 bill looks like, but thank you very much. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] it's similar. it's similar, but that's it, yeah. >> that's the future $10. donald trump is on it. >> jimmy: hey, thank you, buddy. thank you, buddy. you signed it. you said, "jimmy, i love you." thank you, buddy. i appreciate that. thank you very much. >> and my art work is worth quite a lot. so technically, you owe me $1,000. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: that's not fair at all. >> you can paint me something. >> jimmy: yeah, i will, yeah. >> maybe you could sculpt a a picture. or no, you can't sculpt a a picture, can you? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i can't really do much. no, no, i can talk about -- a a good talk. that's all i can really do. [ laughter ] >> i couldn't do that, now. i could make a sculpture of you with your beautil doll's eyes. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: the show, what is in this? stand-up or sketch? >> yeah, i stand-up and etch, and then animation, and then this music as well. and then second half, in the
and then i play a new york cop who has to come out and find me. >> jimmy: you do a new york accent? >> i try do a new york accent. >> jimmy: can i hear it? i'll see if i can -- >> oh, this is so embarrassing. i know this is like you coming to london and go, "oh, blimy, mary poppings." [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: that sounded legit, yeah. >> that was russell brand. [ laughter and applause ] >> i talk about being 40 in my show. i'm like, "why did i do that for?" i had seven years in the bank. >> jimmy: yeah, they thought you were 33, but, no, you're 40. >> the thing that happened when i got to 40 was, that was quite is disturbing, is i find i'm walking with my hands behind my back. [ laughter ] because i found it more comfortable. it's like doing this. [ laughter ] i just kept catching myself. i used to be cool. i'm like prince charles now. what's happened? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i might start doing that. i like walking. >> "what is that?"
your hands behind your back. >> you like it? >> jimmy: it could be a thing. >> i'm there admiring st. paul's cathedral. "what a wonderful structure." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: when are you coming back? because march 15th, you're going to start here in new york. so we have to play -- we'll have to do something when you come back to new york. >> yeah. >> jimmy: we'll do something fun. >> what are we going to do? >> jimmy: i don't know, but i'll think of something. [ laughter ] >> forward rolls. >> jimmy: yeah. >> build a tent. anything. i'll cut your hair if you want. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: not now. we'll see what happens, everybody. noel fielding. [ cheers and applause ] go to noelfielding.co.uk for more info on noel's tour. stick around. i'll be right back with tech expert joshua topolsky, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] i'm going to share a photo of my eggo waffle when it pops up. that's so interesting honey because i'm going to share a photo of my eggo waffle when it pops up.
l'eggo my eggo (answering machine) hey! leave a message. hi, i know you're there, 'cause i can see you. i'm calling you to tell you to l'eggo my eggo! anncr: some things are too delicious to share. golden crispy, warm and fluffy eggo waffles. l'eggo my eggo. there's got to be a way to redeem our hotel points. i just want to take a vacation. this seems crazy. tell us something we don't know, captain obvious. ok. with hotels.com, when you collect 10 nights you get one free.
james drove his rav4 hybrid into the frozen wilderness. the scent of his jerky attracted a hungry wolfpack behind him. to survive, he had to remain fearless. he would hunt with them. and expand their territory. he'd form a bond with a wolf named accalia... ...become den mother and nurse their young. james left in search of his next adventure. how far will you take the all-new rav4 hybrid?
we're having digiorno pizza, fresh-bakein my own oven. okay. it's not delivery, it's digiorno. tired of working for peanuts? well what if i told you that peanuts can work for you? that's right. i'm talking full time delivery of 7 grams of protein and 6 esseseial nutrients. ever seeee peanut take a day off? i don't think so. harness the hardworking power of the peanut. i've smoked a lot and quit a lot, but t ded up nowhere. now i use this. the nicoderm cq patch, with unique extended release technology, helps prevent the urge to smoke all day. i want this time to be my last time. that's why i ihoose nicoderm cq. piano music. i'm glad you finally ma it, dad. you have to experiencecehis city. that's what you always say. you were right about the food. hi john. hey kevin. spent the day with an astronaut. one more. it's beautiful, isn't it? how about a baseball game next time?
done. book priceless experiences around the globe with... ...your world mastercard. only at priceless.com. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. we are now joined by our resident tech expert to look at some of the coolest new gadgets, including a few coming out at this year's consumer electronics show. say hello to joshua topolsky, ladies and gentlemen.
>> jimmy: always good to see you. >> it's great to be here. great to be back. >> jimmy: good to see you, buddy. kids good, baby's good? everything's goo >> daughters wonderful. >> jimmy: good, good, good. you're looking good. >> beautiful child. i'm also wonderful. not a child. >> jimmy: no, you're not. congratulations. >> a full grown man. >> jimmy: thank you. at did you bring for us tonight? >> all right. so i got a couple cool things. this is a kodak super 8. this is a brand-new type of camera. it is,kay, remember super 8 from the '70s? >> jimmy: yeah. >> this takes rere super 8 film. you put the reel in right there. you shoot super 8, you drop it in the mail. they send you back a reel of film and the digital version of what you sho this will bebeut this year. it's gonna be like between $400 and $750. [ light laughter ] >> $750. >> jimmy: okay. >> you're a natural. look how natural it looks in your hands. >> jimmy: well i don't know how you hold it. >nterchangeable lensese >> jimmy: like that? [ laughter ] i don't know how this handle works. >> you can put a long lens on it. >> jimmy: you certainly can. >> a short lens. >> jimmy: yeah. a shsht lens too. >> a lens with a lot of girth. >> jimmy: that will be great.
okay. >> jimmy: that's a fantastic thing. >> this is cool. >> jimmy: is 8-millimeter, is that the best? [ light laughterer >> well,l,t's fewer millimeterer than 16. >> jimmy: there you go. >> okay. >> jimmy: all right. there you go. >> all right, this is the avegant glyph. here, put this on. put this on your head. puputhis on your -- just like that, get in there. >> jimmy: okay. slide in. okay. get that on. >> jimmy: wow. >> you see that? okay. so check it out. display. onto your retinas. >> jimmy: what? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that's not goo right? >> no, no, it's good. it's good. it's good. it's goooo it's good. jimmy: that's not good. wait this crazy. it's like i'm at a movie theater. >> no, no, no. it's so the image is super bright, super crisp. and hold on. let me hit play on this. you can just take a look. look at this. >> jimmy: kendrick, yeah. >> how good is this? >> jimmy: it's really good. > >> jimmy: i'm kendrick, yeah. >> yeah. there's a >> jimmy: w >> it's a sta >> jimmy: i couldn't hear r u at all. >> ok [ lau >> jimmy: but called? >> this is call glyph. >> jimmy: can i just wea
>> you can. >> jimmy: like this. >> but yeah. >> jimmy: so this is more cool the other way? [ laughter ] >> i guess. in the future, gonna be looking around like that. you'll look like a normal g any ho >> jimmy: you don't know about the future. >> this is $699. >> jimmy: o >> $599 preorder right now. >> jimmy: oh it so i >> technology's very complex. okay? >> how do you make this stuff? >> jimmy: i like glyph. >> glyph. all r very spe one of 50 made i ithe i walnut. and it can play, from sweden, it's called the and it can pla any retro video game. it c play like, super nintendo, nes, genesis, gameboy, whatever. [ cheers and applause ] arcade stuff. >> jimmy: wow. >> and you charge it, and can play for like it's like wireless. you can just carry it with you. it has a lit you carry it aroun >> jimmy: questlove. >> you freaking out? >> jimmy: : ah, no. de, my birthday is coming up. next week. >> jimmy: ye >> get a pair. get a pair of >> jimmy: my birthday's to so that's -- >> it's about $2,700. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i'm going to buy one of these things. how much do these gu >> all right. okay. hold on. we have someth come back here. >> jimmy: h yeah. >> this is basically the most advanced vr tech in the world.
v-i-v-e? >> y yh. put this on >> jimmy: yeah. >> just pull that back through there. >> jimmy: i have a very irish head. a very big hd. >> a very strangely large head. >> jimmy: wow. >> all r rht, are you in therere >> jimmy: wait, wait. whoa, whoa. >> are you in? do you see anything? here. take this, this is a hand. >> jimmy: yeah. >> this is another hand. okay. so you're in a demo by google called a tilt brush. okay. you can basically pain 3d space. >> jimmy: well. >> do you see a snowman? [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: wait. yes, i see >> don't. in tha but this is so bizarre. >> now what's c is that it's go trackers. walk around. go head, walk forward >> jimmy: i gonna fall off the st >> walk forward. keep walking. keep walk keep going. keep going. you're okay. yoyoll see a g you get to the edge. keep going. >> jimmy: will i? >> you're walk person [ laughter ] a very old person. >> jimmy: that's how i walk. i'm going to fall. i see green. >> turn around. turn around. okay, look at the snowman now. you can paint in 3d space. take that right brush and start painting. you can actually do brush strokes and you can walk around. get up close to the snowman. [ laughter ] get ininhere.
walk around what's happening in the butt area. what is the snowman doing? >> jimmy: wow. >> all right. [ light laughter ] okay. you can change environments. hold on. hoho on. >> jimmy: alalright. >> go over this way a little bit. >> jimmy: yeah. >> okay, you can go to outer space. you can switch it on your left hand there. >> jimmy: okay. >> there's like an environment switch up at t t top. no, you almost it. the mountain, go back. you swipe up. >> jimmy: no. >> no, go back. >> > >> jimmy: i know. it is. >> all right. go into space. all right, look at beautiful mo [ audienen ooh "tonight show" moo >> jimmy: woah. this is just crazy. >> you can tag want. you could do your logo on it. >> jimmy: i wanted to pu can >> just don't walk backwa far. look at this. you could have a second career as an artist. this is unbelievable. >> jimmy: i just signed my name. [ cheers and applause ] >> any how, all right. let's get you out of here. let's get you t of here. all right. that is the htc vive. >> jimmy: that was so rad. oh my god. >> preorder on february 29th. it's like crazy advanced. >> jimmy: you're the greatest. thank you for coming. >> all right. thanks, man. >> jimmy: say hi to the family. kiss the babies. joshua topolskyy check out his s tomorrowpodcast.com there's mor
[ cheers and applause ] dr. lonnie smith, and the roots over there, ladies and gentlemen, from philadelphia. stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. hope to see you tomorrow. bye-bye, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with
trevor noah -- from "todd maragaret" actor and comedian david cross -- music from x ambassadors -- featuring the 8g band with glen kotche. [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers! >> seth: good evening, i'm seth meyers. this is "late nighgh" how is everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] that's wonderful to hear. in that case, let's get to the news.. in the mososshocking story of the week, a hollywood actor talked to a drug dealer. [ laughter ] it's bound to happen. mexican officials revealed sunday that fugitive drug lord, el chapo, nearly escaped by using a secret doorway hidden behind a mirror, which wouldld have made it hard to capture him
agreement with narnia. [ laughter ] fit right in narnia. the golden globes were held last night in los angeles. the globes were held mostly by double-sided tapap [ laughter ] [ cheers and appuse ] whatat night. what a night! for double-sided tape. leonardo dicaprio won the best actor award at last night's golden globes for his performance in the film "the revenant." dicaprio said it was a real challenge because as someone who dates super models, he's never really had to deal with fur. [ laughter ] you're thinking about it. [ laughter ] some of yoy are thinking about it. donald trump in a new interview continued to question ted cruz's eligibility for president and said if you're born in canada, it's immediately a little bit of
if you weren't born in the u.s., the highest office you can hope for is wife. [ applause ] [ cheers and applause ] the white house revealed over the weekend that president obama privately met with bernie sanders and when she heard this, hillary clinton fake smiled so hard, her ears touched in the back. [ laughter ] the world-famous playboy mansion is for sale. luckily, so is bleach. [ laughter ] you might thininit's bad turning on a black light in there, but it's not. because it's so covered -- [ laughter ] rumors are swirling that apple may come out with a line of
that for some future birthday, dennis hoff, the owner of nevada's famous bunny ranch brothel has announced he will run for senate in 2016, even though the only experience he has with politicians is telling them to "come back soon!" [ laughter ] [ applause ] the village of whitesboro, new york, held a vote today over whether the town should change its seal after it's called racist for showing a white settler choking a native american. [ laughter ] for real. said one native american, "while you're at it, we're not crazy about the name of the town either." [ laughter ] an indiana high school has started serving so-called sandwiches of shame to students with debt on their lunch accounts. great. "now we have to come up with a new slogan," said subway. [ audience ohs ] >> seth: what, did something
[ laughter ] a texas man was arrested for methamphetamine possession after the new year, while wearing a shirt with the phrase "don't meth with me." after proposing to his girlfriend in a local walmart, a michigan man was arrested last week for shoplifting a vibrator and edible thong from a nearby sex store. he's being charged with proposing to his girlfriend in a walmart. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] can't do that. the one place. and finally, the daily beast this weekend ran a dating advice article titled "when you fall in love with a stripper." said the subject of the story, when we met, i thought it was destiny. but it was actually crystal. destiny had the night off. [ laughter ] we -- [ cheers and applause ] you guys, i don't -- i'm not just saying this. we have a great show for you tonight. he is the host of "the daily show" on comedy central. trevor noah joins us tonight! [ cheers and applause ] how about that? also, he's a very funny man, a fantastic actor. he is in the third season of "todd margaret" on ifc. david cross is stopping by the
[ cheers and applause ] huge fan of his. i'm looking forward to that. and we have music from the great new york rock band x ambassadors will be joining us this evening. [ cheers and applause ] but before we get to that, as i mentioned earlier, mexican officials captured notorious drug lord, joaquin guzman, also known as el chapo, friday night. while the details of the capture were fascinated, they were quickly dwarfed by the fact that months earlier, el chapo sat down with sean penn for a "rolling stone" interview. for more on this, it's time for "a closer look." is one of mexico's most powerful drug king pins and one of the world's most wanted fugitives, but he's known as much for his role in mexico's drug war as he is for his creative ways of getting free. >> in 2001, he escaped from the mexican high-security prison puente grande by hiding in a laundry cart and most recently he escaped from the maximum security altiplano prison in july.
crawling into a hole in a cell which led to a mile-long tunnel. >> seth: he is so good at escaping, he does it casually. [ light laughter ] he bursts out of jail the way other people wear khis on a friday. last year he escaped through a mile-long tunnel with light ventilation and a rail system. how could el chapo's gang build such a sophisticated tunnel without being noticed? wetl apparently guards at the prison never bothered to investigate, quote, loud hammering and clanging sounds coming from el chapo's cell. [ laughter ] and before you judge anyone for ignoring mexican clanging, ask yourself what you did the last time a mariachi band played on your subway. i made eye contact with them. no, you didn't. [ laughter ] while el chapo was captured friday night after a firefight, and cnn was thrilled to bringing footage of the hotel authorities held him in. >> this hotel is located on the outskirts of the town.
peect place for federal authorities to bring el chapo. look at this. this is a hotel room that has its own garage space. fairly standard room. got a toilet. it's got a shower. and it's got a sink and wash-up area. and it's located right by the highway. so there are a lot of things that make this room almost ideal for the job that they had. >> is he reporting on the hotel or advertising for it? [ laughter ] that's martin savidge, or as he's also known, the trivago guy. for reports like cnn's were soon a distant memory because on saturday, this photo surfaced. and the first question everyone asked was, "wait, which one is the fugitive?" [ laughter ] him? but bo of them live in the jungle, right? no? okay. but the second question everyone asked was how did an actor get an interview with a wanted fugitive. the world hasn't seen anything
2011 interview of osama bin laden for kosmo titled zero dark thirty sex moves he wished you secretly try. but it turns out that el chapo life reputation and his huge ego is pararof what led to his capture on friday. dreams that put the most infamous drug lord back behind bars. >> thehettorney general said guzman's'sesire to make a movivi about t mself and his interaction with producers and actors eventually led to his arrest. >> officials say they were able to locate him, because his represenentives were contactinin producers and actresses. >> seth: so bad news. the el chapo movie is probably onold. the good ns, if you want to see what it would have looked like, you can just edit together scenes from "scarface" "shawshank redemption." and heratio sanz sketches. [ light laughter ] what did penn find out in his interview with el chapo? well he got him to acknowledge on the record the size and scope of his drug empire and told penn, quote, "i supply more heroin, methamphetamine, cocaine and marijuana than anybody else in the world.
airplanes, trucks and boats." and let me just say when you deal drugs, i'm not impressed that you have airplanes, trucks or boats. i'm impressed you have submarines. [ laughter ] i mean, my uncle has a boat. but if you're so good at dealing drugs you have multiple submarines, take a well-deserved bow. although maybe save some of that submarine money and buy a backup t-shirt. [ laughter ] i want a fleet of planes, i want a fleet of trucks, i want a fleet of boats, one t-shirt. [ laughter ] speaking of men who proudly speak of their riches, penn and el chapo also discussed who else, donald trump. penn writes, "i mention trump, el chapo smiles ironically saying, "ah, mi amigo." [ laughter ] and i can't imagine the contradictions that quote created for trump. he's exactly the kind of mexican i promised to keep oututbut he's also a rich businessman who likes me. i don't know how to feel.
[ applause ] i don't know. how. to feel l now some have criticized "rolling stone" for their journalistic standards as penn promised el chapo he would be able to read the piece before it was published. the other criticism is with what many of described as penn's elaborate writing style. and there is no better example of that than this passage in which penn describes his final meeting with el chapo, writing, quote, "chapo puts his arm over my shoulder and renews his request that i see him in eight days. i'll be saying goodbye now," he says. "at this moment, i expel a minor traveler's flatulence. we escape in subtle groom and i join my colleagues inside the bungalow." [ laughter ] that's not how you describe a fart in front ofof drug lord. that's how you describe a fart at a wintasting. mm, that's playful with a subtle bloom.m. there is no such thing as a people either have no flatulence
the plane. [ laughter ] at the end of the day, i have to be impressed that penn managed to track him down. and i for ononam looking forward to the next t me sean penn interviews el chapo after he escapes from prison again six months from now. this has been "a closer look." [ cheers and applause ] we'll be right back with more "late night"! [ cheers and applause ] now you can create your own tour of italy from olive gardedes most mouthwatering dishes, starting at $12.99. choose 3 of 10 classic favorites to enjoy on one plate.
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[ cheers and applause ] >> seth: welcome back to "late night,6 everybody. please give it up for the 8g band, everyone. [ cheers and applause ] also, very excited about this. sitting in with the great 8g band all week from one of my favorite bands, wilco, glenn kotctc is here. glenn, thank y y. >> nice to be here. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: "star wars," wilco's album released last year, not a tie-in, is nominated for a grammy in the best alternative alalm category. in the first week of february, you can catch glenn and the band at a series of sold out shows at brooklyn's kings theatre and also portchester's capitol theatre. thank you so much for being g here, glenen
week. [ cheers and applause ] now, are you guys familiar with these dog-shaming websites? they'll do is take a picture of a little sign that says what the dog did. here's an example. i like to hide tennis balls around the house. pretty cute, right? nears another one. i ate my daddy's wooden adorable. offenses, after searching on the internet, we found some websiteses featuring g gs that have done much, much worse things. we would like to show it to you now in a segment we call "extreme dog-shaming." [ applause ] >> seth: extreme, indeed. let's take a look at our first dog. aw, it's is a cute little guy. what could he have done. i stand kind of to the side at starbucks so you can't tell if i'm in line or not. [ laughter ] bad dog. who is next? oh, i like this guy. no way he was a bad boy. my e-mail signature is "live,
[ laughter ] i don't even, ugh. who is next? aw, he couldn't have done anything too bad. when there are three urinals, i take the middle one. [ laughter ] and for the ladies in the house, that's a huge bummer. [ laughter ] who is next? oh, too cute. that's all anyone can say. i refer to my girlfriend as "m' lady." [ laughter ] oh, bad dog. who is next? oh, what an n orable puppers. i change my kid's diaper on restaurant tables. there is a wholetation for that. [ light laughter ] bad dog. who is next? this guy is adorable. i watch porn on mypad when i ride the subway. [ laughter ] bad dog! also, there is no signal down there. that means you download it in
who do we have next? , what a pretty pooch. what could she have done. my owner wouldn't let me go outside, so i took over a federal building in oregon. [ laughter ] what are you trying to prove? who is next? aw! that is all i can say. aw. what could he have done. i hate movie-spoilers. that's actually not bad. oh, wait, there's more. like when a a y told me matt damon gets off mars. [ laughter ] come on! true story. earlier totoy, we were going to put a "star wars" spoiler on that, but we realized it was too big of a bummer and the audience would hate us. [ laughter ] but somebody died. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] could be anybody. could be anybody. but if you haven't seen it, and i figure there's only about six
[ laughter ] people. [ laughter ] who do we have next? aw! what could they have done? i'm going act distant until this bitch breaks up with me. [ laughter ] my gosh. who is the next pooch taking the walk of extreme shame? oh! what could this lilile guy have done? uck. [ cheers a applause ] who do we have next? oh, i like him. i'm working on el chapo's next escape tunnel. come on! [ cheers and applause ] he doesn't need your help. who is next? oh, wait a minute!
we brought you here today to get your honest opinion about this new car. to keep things unbiased, we removed all the logos. feels like a bmw. reminds me a little bit of like an audud so, this car supports apple carplay. siri, open maps. she gets me. wow. it also has teen driver technology. it even mutes the rarao until the seatatelts are buckled. i'm very curious what it is. this is the 2016 chevy malibu. and it sells for? it starts at twenty-two five. what? oh wow. i mean with all this technology.