tv The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon NBC November 29, 2016 11:34pm-12:37am EST
musical guest neil diamond. and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: 580, oklahoma! >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! ? ? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh! my oh my! [ cheers and applause ] welcome, everybody. welcome. i love you. welcome to -- welcome to "the tonight show." this is it. you made it.
this is the show. this is the place to be. thank you guys so much for being here. here's what everyone's talking about. of course it's donald trump's latest tweet storm. yesterday, trump tweeted that he will end the united states' relationship with cuba unless that they are willing to make a a better deal. [ light laughter ] when asked how they felt about trump threatening them on twitter, cuban's said, "what's twitter?" [ laughter ] can i get it on my a.m. radio? my '55 chevy? also this morning, trump also tweeted out a threat to take away the citizenship of anyone who burns the american flag. [ audience oohs ] yeah. he says that there are plenty of other things people can burn instead, like their tax returns. [ cheers and applause ] easily. he said, "that's fine." but on a lighter note, i saw that the naked cowboy was performing at trump tower yesterday. [ laughter ]
for trump's cabinet. [ cheers and applause ] that's interesting. that's a coincidence. >> steve: very. >> jimmy: last night, donald trump's campaign manager, kellyanne conway, tweeted out a picture of her and trump working at his desk, looking at trump's computer. take a look at this photo. yeah. now, let's -- see what they're looking at. ? oh, well that's the one thing -- [ cheers and applause ] that's the one thing, bringing everyone together right now it's the "gilmore girls." listen to this. the white house said that president obama and donald trump spoke on the phone for 45 minutes on saturday. everyone knew trump was on the phone because those were the only 45 minutes all week where he stopped tweeting. [ light laughter ] so something must have -- is he okay? [ applause ] i saw that the white house christmas display features a a portrait of hillary clinton, and is positioned between two snowmen. it gave the kids a chance to see old frosty as well as two
old frosty. some news from overseas. kim jong-un has reportedly asked north korean scientists to come up with a special potion that can help men who have trouble performing in the bedroom. [ light laughter ] it's not a surprise, considering how many missiles he's failed to launch. i mean you go -- [ laughter and applause ] at least you could help him out. >> steve: hey, oh! hey! >> jimmy: this is very interesting, fact here. a new global study, finds that more than material items. yeah. so this christmas, just drive your girlfriend to the jewelry store, then tell her, "the trip here was the gift." [ laughter ] [ applause ] i think it will go well. that's a little tip. and finally, i read that to raise awareness of debris in space, a company is letting you adopt a piece of space junk, and they will actually tweet you every time it passes overhead. [ light laughter ] and anthony weiner said, "please, i've been tweeting my junk for years."
it's old. we have a great show tonight. give it up for the roots, everybody! [ cheers and applause ] ? ? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, guys, we have a a big week of shows ahead. tomorrow night, felicity jones will be here. that's always fun. [ then later this week, emma stone will be here. [ cheers and applause ] you love emma stone. >> steve: yes. >> jimmy: she's hosting "saturday night live." >> steve: yes she is. >> jimmy: yes, we love her. chelsea handler will be here. haven't seen chelsea in a a while. [ cheers and applause ] and we got great music from john legend will be here. hey, that's a big week. [ cheers and applause ] but first, we have a fun show tonight. she is an academy award winning actress and star of the new film, "jackie." natalie portman is here, you guys.
just talented, gorgeous, super fun, love her. we're going to catch up with natalie, then we are going to compete in a game of password. [ audience oohs ] yes, it's going to be very interesting. plus, he is producing a great new show on hbo called "westworld," the very talented j. j. abrams is dropping in. [ cheers and applause ] god, we love him. he's just a good dude. he loves what he does. he's just put the extra -- >> steje jewish. he puts the extra jewish in everything. [ light laughter ] >> steve: everything he does. he stirs it up. >> jimmy: queer eye for the straight guy. [ unintelligible ] but anyways yeah carson kressley says -- but, yeah. he does. everything he does, you go, "ah, this one extra little thing. you go, that's the -- that's the j. j. abrams thing," that i just love him. and then we have a legend tonight, one of my all-time favorites, i mean, oh my gosh. i mean, what jams do we like? do you like --
to no one there and no one heard at all not even the chair ? ? then what, it's going to be like -- ? ? everywhere around the world ? ? they're coming to america every time that flag's unfurled they're coming to america ? ? yeah, and then we go from there. [ cheers and applause ] then you got -- you got sneaky ones in there. you got like "heartlight" you can sneak that one in, if you're an "e.t." fan. ? ? turn on your heart light let it shine wherever you go let it make a happy glow for all ? ? yeah, he's got that. then he's got -- ? you don't bring me flowers ? and he's like -- ? you don't sing me love songs ?
me anymore when you come through the door ? ? at the end of the day ? ? oh, yeah. that's our jam, dude. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. >> steve: we sing that every night before we go home. >> jimmy: we sing that every night before we go -- we finish the show, then we sing "you don't bring me flowers." [ laughter ] and then, in the morning, we bring each other flowers. >> steve: yeah, we bring each other flowers. it's fantastic. >> jimmy: but then of course, he sings, of course -- ? ? sweet caroline good times never seemed so good ? ? so good so good so good ? ? he's doing a holiday medley for us tonight. neil diamond is in the house! [ cheers and applause ] he's the greatest! neil diamond. brooklyn's own. brooklyn i think -- yeah. where's brooklyn at? yeah, absolutely. uh hey, guys. i don't know about you guys, but i love podcasts. you guys listen to podcasts? [ cheers and applause ] i mean, i love tv shows a lot. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: much better, but when
podcasts. >> jimmy: i'm setting this bit up so, yeah. podcasts are a great way to pass the time, while you're on your way to work, you're going to the gym, whatever. you know, traveling to school, on your way to prison. >> steve: right. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: whatever you want to do. the other day, i was scrolling through itunes and i noticed that there's a lot of obscure podcasts, that i've never even heard before. >> steve: really? >> jimmy: and i thought it would be nice to check out a a few of them, and tell you guys about them, in a new segment we call "tonight show podcasts." here we go. [ cheers and applause ] ? >> jimmy: so these are -- >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: so this is a -- yeah. >> steve: special? >> jimmy: what's that? >> steve: is that special? >> jimmy: he can't hear me because you've got your headphones on. >> steve: what's that? >> jimmy: now i'm ready to listen to these new podcasts. this first one is a podcast i love. sorry, it's hooked to me here. [ light laughter ] >> steve: you going to plug it into your computer? >> jimmy: there you go. >> steve: you're going to plug it in the computer? >> jimmy: so, yeah. [ whistling ] it's not a ham radio.
obscure podcasts that i don't know if you've heard of. but they're great, and you should check them out. this first one is called "morgan and morgan." >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: all right, and this is a podcast featuring morgan freeman and tracy morgan. [ laughter ] and they're chatting about nature. >> steve: wow, fantastic. >> jimmy: let's give it a a listen. >> the male penguin then begins his mating dance, by carefully approaching the female penguin, flashing his plumage to get her attention. >> oh, man, he about to get th >> jimmy: it's very educational. yeah. >> steve: super educational. >> jimmy: let's see if i got another podcast here. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: this one here is called -- >> steve: you're searching through them? >> jimmy: yeah, i'm looking through them. >> steve: making sure you have the right one? wow, that playlist is long. >> jimmy: no, no, no. let's not do that one. let's do this one. >> steve: skip that one. skip that one. [ talking over each other ] >> jimmy: this one here. this is a great one here. obscure. >> steve: what is it? >> jimmy: this one is called
okay, and what it is, it's a a podcast where beloved nightly news anchor, tom brokaw, just says a bunch of words that start with the letter "h." [ light laughter ] i mean, it's obscure. >> steve: ah, super obscure. >> jimmy: but, i listen to it all the time when i go to the gym. take a listen to this. >> helicopter, handlebars, hanukkah, hallelujah, jalapeno. oops. that last one was a "j." ha, ha, ha. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's not -- how he laughs. he put extra "h's" on the laugh, to let you know. >> steve: he got the "h's" in. and you listen to that at the gym? you're working out, you pop on that brokaw podcast? >> jimmy: no, on the way -- on the way to the gym. >> steve: on the way to the gym. >> jimmy: yeah, yeah, yeah. it's a long commute. >> steve: yeah, yeah, yeah. how long is it? [ light laughter ] how long is that commute? >> jimmy: well, i mean, i usually go down 5th avenue. it's probably about a good 20 minutes. >> steve: 20 minutes, you sure?
5th avenue -- it's probably 25 minutes. >> steve: okay, 25. that sounds more like it. >> jimmy: let me see. >> steve: hilarious. what's the next one? >> jimmy: next one here is a a episode of the shaq podcast. this is a real podcast. this is a podcast hosted by shaquille o'neal. you guys have heard of that before, right? [ cheers ] this is an obscure episode that i'd never heard before. this is not released, but it might come out tonight. anyways this is the podcast hosted by shaquille o'neal. let's take a listen to this. is shaqcast, welcome back, i'm shaq. in shaq news, it's cold outside. so i'm eating lots of soup. i love soup. chicken noodle soup, split pea soup, miso soup. me so happy when i eat miso soup. some soups have funny names. butternut squash, gazpacho, gumbo. dikembe mugumbo. soup's the best. crumble some crackers on the soup. yes, please. you eat soup with a spoon. i eat soup on the moon. i'm gonna be the first man to eat soup on the moon.
that's one small spoon for man. one giant soup for mankind. i'm shaq. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: neil armspoon. >> steve: neil armspoon. >> jimmy: he's got spoons for arms. >> steve: yeah, souping it up on the moon. >> jimmy: yeah, it's not out yet, that podcast. this is the scoop, this is what you get when you come to "the tonight show." i give you these inside -- yeah, inside scoop. [ cheers and applause ] this next podcast is called "alexa and siri's weather forecast." >> steve: oh. j who doesn't love weather? >> steve: everybody loves weather. >> jimmy: kids all -- walking all around the rockefeller christmas tree. >> steve: 24/7, like what's the weather all about. is it raining? >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. so -- instagramming weather. everything. so this is -- snapchatting weather. everything. so this one's all about weather. it has two great hosts, amazon's alexa and apple's siri. let's listen in. >> today's forecast calls for sunny skies and a high of 51 degrees. >> here's the forecast for today.
>> i think you meant to say 51 degrees. >> no. i did not. >> it's on, bitch. >> jimmy: all right, hey. that was a little -- [ applause ] that was a little saucy. >> steve: that got hot fast. are you plugging that into your table? or the desk? oh, wait -- >> jimmy: bluetooth, so it's just -- >> steve: is that like the bluetooth antenna? that thing then? >> jimmy: yeah. it's a brand-new invention. bluetooth antenna, and just wherever you go, it syncs up to your phone whatnot. >> jimmy: this last podcast, you guys -- let me check it. it's called "pee-wee on politics." that's weird, because i didn't even know that pee-wee herman was political. >> steve: wow, i didn't know either. >> jimmy: but this is his pod -- it's very popular. and it's very obscure. take a listen to this. >> so what happened is that, trump got more votes in the electoral college but, due to repeated allegations of russian hacking green party candidate, jill stein, is asking for a a recount in several key swing
so now they're recounting, and recounting, and recounting, and recounting. meanwhile, donald trump's calling the whole thing a scam. i don't know what's going on, folks. looks like we have another caller on line two. caller you're on the air. >> i like soup. >> is this shaq? >> shaq likes soup. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: well that's -- you see, it's fun. >> steve: wow. >> jimmy: that's all the time we have for "tonight show podcasts." we'll be right back with natalie portman, everybody! [ cheers and applause ]
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? [ cheers andla >> jimmy: our first guest -- pcpc welcome back. our first guest is an academy award-winning actress. oh, we just love her. she's getting rave reviews for her starring role as jackie kennedy in the new film, "jackie," which opens in new york and los angeles this friday. please welcome the very lovely natalie portman, everybody!
>> jimmy: come on! are you kidding me? you're -- do you have something to tell me? [ laughter ] >> what do you mean am i kidding? >> jimmy: oh, it's so cute. >> i'm gonna take it off now, my big pillow. >> jimmy: you're showing, and you're glowing. >> oh, thank you. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: i just made that up. you look gorgeous. congratulations. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you're expecting your second baby. this is it. >> yes, i am. >> jimmy: oh, my gosh. [ cheers and applause ] ? >> thanks, guys. >> jimmy: i hate doing this to them, yeah. i saw you over the summer, and you didn't say a word to me. >> well, it was early. >> jimmy: yeah, i know. >> i thought everyone would know because i wasn't drinking. >> jimmy: yeah, i just thought that you were just clean living now. >> yes. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i go, "that's natalie. she rolls like that, man." >> yeah, i'm very clean. >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. you're like, "oh, it's cooler."
>> jimmy: yeah, so i was like, "wow, that's awesome." i'm neither a vegan nor not-drinking. [ laughter ] really, i was so not pregnant. [ laughter ] but this is unbelievable. >> thanks. >> jimmy: this is great. are people treating you differently? are they like, "oh, a baby"? >> well, it's weird because i'm -- you know, i'm a small person in general. >> jimmy: yeah. >> so, you show a lot faster and a lot more when you're small, and everyone thinks i'm, like, about to pop and about to give birth at any minute. and, i have, like, months and months. [ laughter ] >> i went to the store the other day to, like, buy water, and the guy at the checkout counter was like, "almost, huh?" >> jimmy: no. >> not at all. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: not even close. gosh, you're way off, dude. >> yeah, exactly. >> jimmy: "leave me alone," yeah. >> exactly. >> jimmy: are you excited about the holidays? >> yeah. >> jimmy: this is the perfect time. come on. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's so great. and this is a -- i always forget this. do you celebrate christmas or -- >> i celebrate hanukkah. >> jimmy: yeah. >> i'm jewish. >> jimmy: yeah. >> but, my husband's family celebrates christmas, so we usually do hanukkah at ours and
time. >> jimmy: that's right. >> it's really nice. >> jimmy: christmas eve is the first night of hanukkah. >> yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, that's exciting. >> so they're coming to us, and my parents -- i was like -- i was asking my husband, "is it okay, you know, for your family if we don't have a tree?" and my parents are like, "we can get a tree." so excited, like, my whole life, no christmas tree. and then, all of a sudden, we they have this great excuse because it's kind of every jew's, like, secret wish to have a christmas tree. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: because it's just a a festive thing. >> it's so pretty. >> jimmy: yeah, it's pretty, yeah. >> why can't w >> jimmy: you can have a a menorah and a tree. >> yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. so are you getting a tree? >> i think so! >> jimmy: hey, this is exciting! [ cheers and applause ] >> 35 years. >> jimmy: oh, my -- >> it took 35 years to get here. >> jimmy: your first hanukkah tree. >> my first, yeah. >> jimmy: yeah, so your christmas-hanukkah tree. >> yeah. >> jimmy: we -- i wanted to help you celebrate your first tree. i got you an ornament. >> thank you. >> jimmy: yeah, this is -- [ gasps ] >> jimmy: this is a a "tonight show" -- >> oh. >> jimmy: it's kind of blue and silver, and that's me all over the place. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ]
this if they wanted to buy it? >> jimmy: all you have to do is go to jimmy fallon. we only have 39 left, you guys. [ laughter ] what's that? oh, we have 38 left, and they're all numbered and signed. no, that's just -- that's just you, but it will give you -- >> thank you. >> jimmy: the christmas spirit. it's not like you need that. i mean, but that will be so -- >> yeah, that's really nice. thank you. >> jimmy: it's really cute for you. this is a super fun time. because i, yeah -- i know i'm excited for you, but you have another baby as well. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's going to be fantastic. >> thank you. buzz, buzz, buzz on this film. congratulations on this. >> thank you. >> jimmy: did you ever think that you could play jackie kennedy, jackie onassis? >> no. i -- you know, i never really thought of myself as, like, i could do imitations of a real person, and she's so well known. >> jimmy: i never thought you looked like her, i mean, because -- >> yeah, i don't particularly look like her either. but when the thing that is remarkable is that when you put the wig on, like -- >> jimmy: that's it. >> everyone could look like her. >> jimmy: yeah, no. >> so, it's so iconic. >> jimmy: but you have the
that something that you can go, like, "oh, good. that's catchy." >> it's a very specific accent because i'm from long island, so -- >> jimmy: a-ha, yes! [ cheers ] >> i can -- yes. i can -- i can go back to my roots quite easily, and she's got some of that, like -- [ new york accent ] the talk and walk and hall -- >> jimmy: that's so good. >> i can go there easily. but then, she has this, like, fancy thing, too, that, you know, from finishing schools, like rather. >> jimmy: oh, yeah, rather. >> i rather like this hall. [ laughter ] >> jimmybo >> jimmy: i mean, it's so good when you watch it. you go, "oh i" -- that's a compliment to your acting too. >> thank you. >> jimmy: i forget that it's you in the movie, and i'm, like, just watching this. >> oh, thanks. >> jimmy: and it's based off of this "life" magazine story that was about, basically, after the assassination of jfk, how -- what jackie went through. >> mm-hmm. >> jimmy: and what was her process. and, it's tricky stuff, but you're like, "oh, yeah. of course that had to happen." >> right. >> jimmy: like, her decision to
>> right. >> jimmy: during the procession, and you go -- it's just stuff like that, you go, "oh, i wouldn't even think to think of that stuff." >> yeah. all of the details of what had to happen with the planning afterwards. but yeah, exactly. you don't really consider until you start watching. >> jimmy: you're really good. i want to show everyone a clip. >> thank you. >> jimmy: here's natalie portman as jackie kennedy in "jackie." take a look at this. >> would you mind getting a a message to the funeral guests for me. >> of course. >> inforem t with jack tomorrow, alone if necessary. and tell general de gaulle that if he wishes to ride in an armored car or in a tank for that matter, i won't blame him. and i'm sure the tens of millions of people watching won't either. >> why are you doing this, mrs. kennedy? >> i'm just doing my job. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: just doing your job.
los angeles december 2nd. getting a lot of good award buzzes, and you deserve it, buddy. >> thank you. >> jimmy: natalie and i will play "password" when we come back. it's gonna be fun. come on back! [ cheers and applause ] ? stand back, ya hear! breakout the syrup because denny's new fluffier, tastier,
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? ? [ cheers and applause ] s i'm your host, steve higgins, and we're about to play a game of "password." [ cheers and applause ] ? >> steve: very funny. to my right is our first player, her new movie "jackie," opens in new york and los angeles on friday, it's natalie portman! [ cheers and applause ] and to my left, we have the host of nbc's "tonight show" and saugerties sweetheart,
[ cheers and applause ] now, natalie, your partner tonight is an incredibly talented writer, director, producer and one of the minds behind "westworld," which airs sundays at 9:00 p.m. on hbo, please welcome j.j. abrams! [ cheers and applause ] >> hello. >> good to see you. >> wow, [ inaudible ] >> steve: and jimmy, you will be playing with one of the best-selling musicians of all time, his new album, "acoustic christmas" comes out tomorrow. it's neil diamond! [ cheers and applause ] s >> jimmy: oh my god. >> what's up, jimmy? >> jimmy: ay caramba. come on. >> jimmy: that's what i'm talking about. >> you should have brooklyn on yours too. >> jimmy: i was born in brooklyn, but yeah i was raised in --
brooklyn versus -- [ inaudible ] >> steve: -- manhasset. >> jimmy: long island versus brooklyn right here. >> long island. >> jimmy: absolutely. >> oh yeah. >> jimmy: neil it's good to see you, buddy. thank you for joining us. >> thank you. >> steve: i will give each of you a password. >> jimmy: mhm. >> steve: then you are to give a one-word clue, one word only, to get your partner to guess the password. >> jimmy: yeah. >> steve: if the clue is illegal as determines by our judges you shall hear this. [ buzzer ] now the team with the most points after four questions, wins. now, any questions? >> jimmy: yeah. >> steve: great. first clue goes to jimmy and >> jimmy: alright here we go. we got this -- >> steve: the password is -- >> jimmy: -- by the way. >> steve: jimmy. >> jimmy: why don't we start us off? ready? >> steve: one word. one word only. >> jimmy: yep. >> steve: one word. [ laughter ] >> just one. >> jimmy: i know, i know, i know, i know. mamba. >> charo. [ laughter ]
>> jimmy: charo. natalie. >> okay. chip. [ laughter ] remember his? >> skip. >> steve: oh, almost. [ laughter ] >> brooklyn is on the line. >> jimmy: guacamole. >> salad. >> steve: oh, unbelievable. that was for three points. natalie, your -- your turn. not salad. >> okay. yeah. meringue. >> salsa. [ cheers and applause ] >> should've guessed [ inaudible ]. >> pal, we don't get any points -- >> jimmy: no, we don't get half a point.
j.j. jimmy. >> the password is -- >> steve: j.j., you're up first. >> jimmy: j.j. is up first. >> steve: j.j. is up first. >> this is tough. [ light laughter ] >> oh, no. okay. >> can i have like 20 minutes? okay, here we go. last. >> dingle. >> can i use salad again? [ laughter ] can i get a different word? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: you can't get a a different word. >> scratch. oh, that's a good one. track. >> what? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: laugh track. >> oh track. no, no. >> steve: oh, wow.
>> that's actually a great answer. >> okay. >> it's wrong, but it's great. [ laughter ] >> alright, keep moving. >> laugh and track. >> feather. >> tickle. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: wow, laugh scratch is a tickle. >> jimmy: i was thinking laugh track, scratch track. >> yeah. >> that was amazing. >> jimmy: it wasn't invented with black and white -- [ laughter ] >> pretty great. >> steve: jimmy and natalie, th the password is -- natalie, you're going to start us off. [ light laughter ] >> okay. dwarf. >> grumpy. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: what?
[ laughter ] >> steve: okay. the final clue -- >> jimmy: how many points is this one worth? 14? >> steve: what this one? 14? >> steve: next one's gonna be 14 and a half. >> jimmy: all right, we got this. >> steve: okay, ready? neil? >> jimmy: neil, yeah. >> steve: okay. >> the password is -- >> steve: okay neil, you're going to start us off. >> leafy. [ laughter [ laughter ] >> jimmy: he goes nuts for salad. i've never heard anyone talk about salad more in my life. it's unbelievable. >> jimmy: are you sure you're not vegan? i mean -- leafy. >> steve: leafy. >> jimmy: oh my goodness. leafy. >> jimmy: oh, man. what? >> steve: leafy. >> jimmy: leafy. no it's -- you already said leafy, now i got to go into this. leafy is -- if you have a leafy and i don't want to say salad.
>> go ahead, you got it. >> jimmy: i do have it? >> yeah, you -- it's right at the tip of your tongue. >> jimmy: leafy. bush? [ laughter ] >> maybe. >> steve: wait. is that your answer? [ laughter ] all right. >> so close. >> steve: this is a family show. >> jimmy: leafy, bush? >> oh bush, oh. >> steve: like a hedge. like a hedge. >> sure. alright. >> think about this. >> leafy. >> christmas. >> mistletoe. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: oh, my god! >> jimmy: thank you, natalie portman, j.j. abrams, neil diamond, my partner. congratulations. more "tonight show" after the break.
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? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. our next guest is a very, very talented man who has directed such blockbuster films as "star wars: the force awakens." i know, yeah. [ cheers ] and "mission impossible 3." he also produced such hit shows as "" [ cheers ] and now he's back with the new hbo series "westworld," which has its season finale this sunday night at 9:00 p.m. ladies and gentlemen, please welcome j.j. abrams! [ cheers and applause ] ?
that was fun. >> jimmy: thank you for playing "password." >> oh, it was all natalie. she killed it. >> jimmy: no, i mean, yes, you -- yeah. >> it was -- i love game shows. >> jimmy: yeah, me too. >> they're so much fun. >> jimmy: i grew up with game shows. >> yeah, me too. it was the best. >> jimmy: good, i'm so happy you played. yeah, just me and neil, we were on a salad kick, man. [ laughter ] i don't know what -- couldn't get off it. >> guacamole salad. >> jimmy: guacamole salad, man. i gotta invent it now, so now this becomes a real thing. >> i know. >> jimmy: i want to ask this. your daughter posted this photo on instagram. this is someone as a kid. [ audience aws ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: do you remember this guy? >> i think that that's, you know, why you don't want to have kids because they print things. [ laughter ] they post things. >> jimmy: they post things online, yeah. >> that was -- yeah. that was me. >> jimmy: that's a cute little guy. how old are you there in there? >> i think, like, 26. [ laughter ] i was rocking a collar, apparently. >> jimmy: that's good. a decent size, that's a decent collar. >> it was also a weapon. you could use it to -- [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: chinese throwing star if you unfolded it all the way. >> yeah, that was --
you? >> i was a -- i was not a a naturally-born athlete, jimmy. >> jimmy: no, you were not. [ laughter ] >> i was like -- and then, when you don't get picked, you don't get any better. and when you don't get better, you don't get picked. it's a vicious cycle. [ laughter ] so, i was doing -- i would do plays. that was my whole thing, writing and trying to do theater. >> jimmy: really? >> yeah. >> jimmy: at a super young age. >> yeah, i mean, since i was a a little kid, yeah. >> jimmy: and when did you stop performing? >> well, what happened was, i used to do improv. there's a theater in l.a. called the groundlings. >> jimmy: absolutely, ye all these classes. kathy griffin was a teacher of mine. and i would do, like, the thursday shows. the guests, they would invite me to do thursday shows sometimes. >> jimmy: that's the best. >> so, i would do these shows. it was great. >> jimmy: yeah. >> and i would do these shows, and then the one i think i would say to the director, melanie graham, i said, "just don't have me sing." >> jimmy: yeah. >> "i can't sing and improv. i can't improv sing." >> jimmy: yeah, that's not your deal. >> i'm no lin-manuel miranda. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah, yeah. >> so, and she said, "who?" and i said, "he hasn't been born yet." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: in the future, we'll get that. >> "in the future, he'll be awesome."
show, she has me sing. and, there's, like a hundred people in the theater. and she wants me to sing something about writing a a novel. so, i'm singing these words, and i'm doing this hand gesture. and, i'm in the moment that -- when you have a nightmare, and you think, "oh, if i was on stage naked." but i'm -- it's real. and i'm doing this thing that is so embarrassing and so bad, that for years, literally years later, i'd be driving and i would, like, remember this hand gesture. and singing this song about it's like throwing up. and, it was horrible. >> jimmy: yeah. >> for years. >> jimmy: ooh. >> so, years later, i got over it. i thought, "it's not that bad." >> jimmy: yeah. i'm -- what am i doing? i'm making a big deal about this stupid thing. >> jimmy: it's an improv thing. >> who would ever, right? >> jimmy: yeah. >> years after that, jimmy fallon, i meet will ferrell. >> jimmy: yeah. >> comic genius. >> jimmy: yeah. >> a god of comedy, right? >> jimmy: yeah, i love him. >> will ferrell? >> jimmy: yeah. >> yeah. [ laughter ] so, i go over to will ferrell, and i'm, like -- i'm star struck.
name is j.j. abrams. i'm such a fan." he said, "oh, we've met." i said, "we haven't met. i would know. i'd remember if we met." he said, "no, no. we met. you were at the groundlings, and you did a piece about" -- >> jimmy: oh no! [ laughter and applause ] ? [ applause ] oh, no! of all people! >> and that was when i stopped acting. >> jimmy: oh, no! >> it was horrifying. >> jimmy: he remembered that? >> he didn't just remember. he did it in a way where he was like, "i know you know." [ laughter ] >> jimmy: "oh, no. i did that thing." it was grim, and thank you. >> jimmy: yeah, exactly. but, you're lucky everything turned out great. yeah, exactly. >> it was all right. >> jimmy: congrats on every single thing. i got to say -- i said it before earlier in the show, but the thing i love about you is that you put these extra -- >> it's very kind of you to say. in the case of "westworld," it is 100% jonah nolan and lisa joy who run that show and kill it, and are doing an amazing job. and, it really is them. i mean, the writing is amazing, the direction. jonah wrote, and lisa wrote the
directed as well as the pilot, and just did an amazing job. i just can't wait for you to see how insane it is. >> jimmy: aren't you -- because you've been trying to get it from michael crichton for a a long time. >> yeah, i met with him about 20 years ago about doing the revisiting "westworld." and then jerry weintraub ten years ago. and, both of those amazing people are no longer with us. but it was really something i've loved for a very long time. >> jimmy: well, aren't you happy it is out now with technology the way it is just because it -- the most amazing thing about "westworld" is the actors. like, the effects are incredibly cool and everything, but the performances, they're just -- they're just doing such an amazing job, evan rachel wood -- >> jimmy: they're fantastic. >> jeffrey wright, anthony hopkins, ed harris, it's an amazing group. >> jimmy: this is a longer one. this season finale. >> yeah, it's a 90-minute season finale that is crazy and the -- >> jimmy: no spoilers. you never give me spoilers. >> no, well, i -- come on. you don't really want spoilers. >> jimmy: i don't want spoilers. >> and i will say that the next
it's really an amazing thing that they've done. >> jimmy: here's a sneak peek from the season finale of "westworld." take a look. >> you will announce your retirement tonight after introducing you to meredith. ? >> what about the hosts? >> we'll make some changes, simplifications. i assure you, they won't mind a a bit. >> oh. might smash all my toys and go home? >> no, because i know you. that's been the great gift of this place, hasn't it? for a little project, to know ourselves and the people around us? [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: a-ha! j.j. abrams. the season finale of "westworld" airs sunday at 9:00 p.m. on hbo. [ cheers and applause ] neil diamond performs for us next.
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>> jimmy: tonight's musical guest is a member of both the rock and roll hall of fame and the songwriters' hall of fame. he's sold over 130 million albums worldwide. [ cheers and applause ] just the greatest. performing "the christmas medley" off of his new album, "acoustic christmas," please welcome neil diamond! [ cheers and applause ] ? >> thank you so much. be ready. ? santa claus is coming it's almost day santa claus is coming it's almost day ? ? chickens crow from midnight it's almost day ? ? chickens crow from midnight it's almost day ? ? candy canes and sugar plums it's almost day ? ? candy canes and sugar plums
? cause santa claus is coming it's almost day ? ? santa claus is coming it's almost day ? ? quit your peeping round the corner on christmas day ? ? quit your peeping round the corner on christmas day ? ? cause santa claus is coming it's almost day ? ? santa claus is coming it's almost day ? ? hang your stockings from the chimney ? hang your stockings from the chimney on christmas day ? ? and santa claus is coming it's almost day santa claus is coming it's almost day ? ? children all get happy on christmas day children all get happy on christmas day ? ? cause santa claus is coming it's christmas day ? ? santa claus is coming
>> hey, and this is just a a little tune that i made up myself. dig in. ? make a joyful noise sing a happy song lift up your every voice now everybody sing along ? ? sing a song of love love is what we need thanks to the stars above ? ? for every gift that we receive ? ? we wish you a merry christmas we wish you a merry christmas ? ? we wish you a merry christmas and a happy new year ? ? we wish you a merry christmas we wish you a merry christmas ? ? we wish you
and a peaceful new year ? >> merry christmas, everybody! be kind. it's all we really have left. ho, ho, ho, ho. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's what was up. come on. neil diamond! [ cheers and applause ] thank you, buddy. catch neil diamond performing on christmas in rockefeller center tomorrow night on nbc. [ cheers and applause ] ?
[ cheers and applause ] ? >> jimmy: my thank you to natalie portman, j. j. abrams, neil diamond once again, ladies and gentlemen! [ cheers and applause ] and the roots right there from philadelphia, pennsylvania. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great night. i hope to see you tomorrow. bye-bye, everybody. [ cheers and applause ]
[ cheers and applause ] ? >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- lester holt, star of "search party," actress alia shawkat, author jade chang, featuring the 8g band with keith carlock. ? [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: good evening, i'm seth meyers, this is "late night." how is everybody doing tonight? well, that is wonderful to hear. in that case, let's get to the news. president obama and donald trump met at the white house today. where they discussed foreign and