tv Late Night With Seth Meyers NBC February 23, 2016 12:37am-1:37am EST
>> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in seth meyers." tonight -- anthony mackie, from broadway's "hamilton", actress renee elise goldsberry, comedian neal brennan, featuring the 8g band. [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers. [ cheers and applause ] i'm seth myers. this is "late night." how is everybody doing tonight? [ cheers and applause ] fantastic to hear. let's get to the news. hillary clinton and donald trump won this weekend in nevada and south carolina respectively, because americans are ready for
experienced leadership. or the opposite. [ laughter ] jeb bush has dropped out of the presidential race. when reached for comment he said, "oh, now you want to talk to me? great." [ laughter ] that's right, jeb bush is out of the presidential race. so now he's replaced his old campaign logo with this new one. [ laughter and applause ] according to a new report, bernie sanders has raised over $16 million from unemployed americans. wow. that was awfully nice of the kardashians. [ laughter and applause ] fox news, on thursday, praised home improvement star tim allen for being quote, "very brave" and "coming out of the closet" as being a republican. unlike his cowardly neighbor, wilson. [ laughter ] where do you stand!? [ laughter ]
critics and says it has no sympathy for terrorists, despite refusing fbi orders to unlock private iphone data. in fact, apple hates terrorists so much it's releasing a new u2 album just for them. [ laughter ] don't worry, they won't be able to find where it is. [ light laughter ] government regulators have released a new statement saying that no hoverboard scooter currently on the market meets proper safety standards. the other thing hoverboard scooters don't meet -- women. [ light laughter ] oh, hey. [ applause ] two historians are claiming they have uncovered medical records listing hitler's penis size. and apparently, hitler's penis size is listed as, "he started world war ii." [ laughter ] a new report has found that india's equivalent of amazon.com has started offering drugs like
which is ridiculous. people on meth sold their computers a long time ago. [ light laughter ] a man in london has legally changed his name to bacon double cheeseburr. apparently he was embarrassed by his real name, bacon leslie cheeseburger. [ light laughter ] true story. i bet the writer of that joke, i bet him it would work. [ laughter ] not only did he get paid for writing it, he got another $20 for it bombing. [ laughter ] the kind of scam that's being run on me. [ laughter ] bacon leslie cheeseburger. made he laugh. [ light laughter ] it was worth it. you know what? it was worth the $20 for the chuckle i got. backstage by myself. [ light laughter ] and finally a new study found that men who keep their cell phones in their pockets
effected due to heat. while men that keep their cell phones on their belts don't have to worry about their sperm levels. [ laughter and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, we have a great show for you tonight. from the film "triple 9", anthony mackie is back on the show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] she is one of the stars of broadway's ground-breaking hit show, "hamilton." renee elise goldsberry is with us. [ cheers and applause ] and he is a very funny comedian and he's also one of my nearest and dearest friends. neal brennan is back on "late night" tonight. [ cheers and applause ] cannot wait to talk to him. before though -- before we get to all of that, donald trump won a decisive victory in south carolina's republican primary on saturday night. and he did it after a week in which he repeatedly changed his positions on some of the core beliefs of the conservative movement. which raises the question -- does it even matter what trump's positions are, and do gop voters even care?
[ cheers and applause ] >> seth: so for the gop establishment the unthinkable has happened. trump is now the undisputed front-runner for the republican nomination for president. which has everyone asking the same question. >> can donald trump be stopped? >> can he, will he be stopped? >> is donald trump unstoppable? >> is there any stopping donald trump? >> can anything stop him? >> how can he be stopped? >> seth: the media is talking about trump's win the way reporters in the movie "armageddon" talked about the asteroid. [ laughter ] "he's going to destroy the eastern seaboard." [ laughter ] and now the gop has handpicked two astronauts to destroy the asteroid before it destroys us, ted cruz and marco rubio. [ laughter ] and just know gentlemen, this is a suicide mission. they spent $150 million to outfit the last man that tried to stop the trumperoid and he missed so badly he's currently floating in outerspace. [ laughter and applause ] we even have -- we even have his last transmission.
[ laughter ] >> seth: so cruz and rubio are vying to be the last non-trump candidate standing. which explains why, once again, despite coming in a distant second and third and winning zero delegates in south carolina, both of them acted like they won. >> the 21st century conservative movement is the son of a bartender and a maid from cuba who, tonight, stands one step closer to being the 45th president of the united states of america! >> once again, we have made history. >> seth: ted cruz, you did not make history. [ laughter ] in 20 years, if a history teacher asks "who finished third in the 2016 south carolina primary?" they're either a dick or professor ted cruz. [ laughter and applause ] and marco -- marco, you finished third in iowa, fifth in new hampshire, and a distant second in south carolina. you're not one step closer to anything. you're effectively on the same step, and that's bad because the
[ applause ] >> seth: remember back when it was a joke? [ laughter ] but the amazing thing about the results in south carolina is that trump won after a week in which he repeatedly changed his positions on some of the most fundamental beliefs of the republican party. for example, in a republican debate last week, he claimed george w. bush lied to justify the war in iraq. >> they lied. they said there were weapons of mass destruction. there were none. >> seth: that upset many gop voters, so a few days later trump did a complete 180. >> do you believe he either lied or did not lie? are you willing to say -- >> i don't know what he did. i just know it was a terrible mistake. >> so was it was a mistake for you to say in that debate that you thought he lied? >> i'd have to see the exact word. look, i don't know. i would probably say that something was going on. >> you would not say again that george w. bush lied. >> i don't know. i can't tell you. i'd have to look. >> okay. [ laughter ] >> seth: his hair looks like cotton candy because he's always spinning. [ laughter and applause ] but trump kept reversing
for example, he also claimed he's been against the iraq war in 2003, comparing it to the first gulf war which he said he supported. >> senior bush did the right thing. he knocked the heck out of them and then pulled back, okay. hey didn't get into the quagmire. and that was okay to do. >> seth: but then audio surfaced that contradicted trump's comments, and once again, he tried to back pedal. >> let me play you the howard stern clip in 2002. >> are you for invading iraq? >> yeah, i guess so. you know, i wish the first time it was done correctly. >> "i wish the first time it was done correctly." what do you mean by that? >> well, what i mean by that is it almost shouldn't have been done and you know, i really don't even know what i mean. because it was a long time ago and who knows what was in my head. [ laughter ] >> seth: all right, first off, let me say how happy i am that we finally have a presidential candidate who can be confronted with the sentence, "let me play you the howard stern clip." [ laughter ] second off, it's nice that even
his head. but that wasn't even trumps most egregious violation of republican orthodoxy. because on thursday, just days before the south carolina republican primary, he was asked about the affordable care act, a law republicans have tried to repeal over 50 times, and which trump himself called, "a disaster." but this time trump shocked republicans everywhere by saying, quote, "i like the mandate." a republican praising the obamacare mandate. that's like drake saying, "you know, meek mill has some good points." [ light laughter ] once again trump tried to back-track and explain away his remarks. >> there's no mandatory anything. you can call it whatever you want. i don't like the term mandate, personally because that sort of means mandatory. >> seth: "mandate sort of -- uh means mandatory." another reminder never to pay for the donald trump s.a.t. prep course. [ laughter and applause ] so if trump has repeatedly changed his positions and said things that go against the basic platform of the republican party then why do trump supporters still back him? what do they actually believe?
gave us at least one clue. in south carolina, 38% of trump voters say they wish the south had won the civil war. that's right. they wish the south had won. which is why they're supporting a new york real estate mogul who uses "south" to mean, "below central park." [ laughter ] and in addition to that, exit polling also found that 73% of voters in south carolina supported temporarily banning muslims from entering the u.s. 73%. what the results in south carolina made clear is that trumps positions on issues the republicans claim to care about don't really matter. he's stoking racist resentment towards muslims, mexicans, and other immigrants by saying like this tweet he posted on the day of the primary. "i wonder if president obama of justice scalia if it were held in a mosque. very sad that he did not go." of course he wouldn't have gone if it was held in a mosque. he didn't survive as a secret muslim president for this long by falling for an obvious trap like that. [ laughter ] come on.
for those in the gop rooting against trump, the only light at the end of the tunnel is that as other candidates drop out support might coalesce behind someone other than trump. but with each day trump wins, that light fades. in fact, trump is so anti-light that he made it clear at an atlanta rally when the lights went out that he preferred it that way. >> oh, i like that much better! no, get those lights off! off! turn them off! they're too bright! turn 'em off! turn 'em off! let's go, ready? [ chanting ] turn off the lights! turn off the lights! [ laughter ] >> seth: that's donald trump, a candidate, a front runner, who admits that he prefers to keep people in the dark. this has been "a closer look." [ cheers and applause ] we'll be right back with more "late night" after this.
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[ cheers and applause ] starred in films like "captain america: winter soldier." in theaters this friday. let's take a look. >> you doing that? >> i should ask you the same thing. why did you throw a guy on the ground to try to incite a riot? didn't hear him. >> running his mouth? what, did he hurt your feelings? this is the streets, that's what people do. do you even know who that is?
he was getting the way of my investigation. >> get out of school, man. there ain't no obstruction up here. that's luis pinto. he is a mara salvatrucha lieutenant. you think somebody going to talk now? >> oh, he's a lieutenant? >> yeah. >> i didn't realize it. i'll just go apologize to him, then. >> this ain't a game, chris. the rules around here different. there ain't buckhead, all right? >> seth: please welcome back to the show anthony mackie. [ cheers and applause ] >> that was a very aggressive clip! >> seth: that was -- yeah. >> man! >> seth: a few. >> a few bleep, bleep, bleep. >> seth: yes. >> that's how i talk -- >> seth: because you said real words there. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> seth: you don't just all of a sudden go quiet in the actual movie. >> i don't look away. like, seth, what's -- with you. [ light laughter ] i don't do that. i go all the way in. >> seth: you play a cop who's
"f" word. >> not at all. i've never heard a cop say that. [ laughter ] >> seth: that's the thing about hard core cops -- though, this is exciting. woody harrelson, chiwetel ejiofor. >> yes. >> seth: kate winslet is in the film. >> seth: aaron paul, fantastic actor as well. but kate winslet, now, this obviously happens in movies all the time, you were not -- >> no. no. i actually didn't believe she was in the movie. >> seth: okay. [ light laughter ] >> i mean, you know, directors and producers say stuff to get you to sign on to movies. we don't want to say it. it's kind of a secret. we have kate winslet." >> seth: uh-huh. >> i was like, "i love kate winslet." i mean, i can't wait to work with her. and then i read the script and i'm like, "well, i'm not working with her." [ light laughter ] so, you know, i get to set, i start shooting, i'm like, "where's kate winslet?" you know, you walk around, you look at the trailers. her name isn't on them. where her trailer at? you know? so one day we're working and there's a woman on set. i'm like, "wow, that's a wildly attractive young lady." >> seth: uh-huh. >> right? so i walk up, i'm like, "oh, she
>> seth: so you can confirm now she is in the film. >> she was in the movie. >> seth: gotcha, that's good to know. >> at least one day. the day i was there she was there. >> seth: now this film has a lot early in the film there's a bank robbery. you're driving in a car. red smoke in the car. it seems, like, very intense. is that something that you as an actor turn over to the stunt men? >> i try. especially since we have full masks on and the director was like, "no, i want you to do it." so all of us get in the car -- >> seth: anybody could because of the mask. >> anybody could -- you could do that. >> seth: i could do -- >> you could do that. >> seth: i could have been -- that's the one scene i could have been you. >> no, no, no. [ laughter ] >> seth: hey! what the -- are you talking about? [ laughter ] >> no. >> seth: no, you're right. you're right. you're totally right. >> but no, it was like i look up and i'm like, "but where is chiwetel?" they're like, "oh, well, he's not doing this stunt." hold on, time-out, time-out. we sitting in this van, literally every time they open
on to the ground and put oxygen masks on -- >> seth: because of the smoke? >> because of the smoke and he's eating bon bons in his trailer. so we finish and we walk back to base camp and he goes, "oh, so how was the stunt?" like dude, we literally about to punch you in the face. [ light laughter ] it was the worst. it was -- >> seth: how did he get out of it and you guys didn't? >> because he told them that they should put the camera in his seat. >> seth: oh. >> so if the camera's in his seat he can't be sitting there, because the camera's in his seat. and i'm like, "well hell, put the camera in my seat." [ light laughter ] >> seth: now you know for next time. >> yeah. >> seth: this is -- the movie is very exciting. this is truly a big deal. you're from new orleans -- >> yes. >> seth: and you got to be part of the mardi gras parade. you were -- what do you call it? the king of the bacchus? >> i was king bacchus -- >> seth: king macchus. >> not king of the bacchus. apologies. >> yeah. >> seth: there you are on a vip. >> seth: we can't really see -- well that's the float, but there's the look right there. >> oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: my goodness. >> oh, yeah. >> seth: what does this entail?
because every year -- bacchus was started by this restaurateur family in new orleans called the brennan family, which is like the family of new orleans. and every year they pick someone to be the king. and, you know, you get to go to children's hospital. and it's really life changing when you see these kids' eyes light up when they see you. i mean, it really lets you know that you're doing something right, you know? and you get to go and meet people and, you know, go to the grocery stores and shake old ladies' hands and pick melons for them. [ light laughter ] >> seth: nothing you've mentioned is anything i've thought about when i thought about new orleans. >> no, no, no. picking melons for old ladies is really important. [ laughter ] no, it's great, man. it was by far the coolest thing i've ever done. >> seth: how long were you on the float going around the city? >> well, it was estimated 2.5 million people. huge turn out. >> seth: wow. >> the parade route was about four and a half hours of relentless throwing of doubloons and cups.
were on the doubloons? >> i have -- the boy got his own money. >> seth: wow. >> that was my face. [ cheers and applause ] my face was on the doubloon. my face and my name. so you knew it was me, otherwise it looked like al jarreau. [ laughter ] >> seth: now, this is exciting. you get to be the king for a year, yes? >> definitely, because if i'm the king until mardi gras, mardi gras is over. they wait until the end of next year to pick a king. it'll be anarchy. you know what i mean? >> seth: yeah. >> so i have to stay on the throne, i tell my wife she has to call me king. you know, the kids have to call me king. so all my friends, now they call me king mac. >> seth: you have three kids, yes? >> yes. >> seth: one is too young for the floats. the other ones, did they get on the float with you? were they excited? >> no, they're too small. i have like, little pages. the king has pages. you know, little dudes he sends off to do stuff. >> seth: how old are the pages on the float? >> 9 to 11. >> seth: okay. >> so that way you can tie them to the float so they don't -- even if they fall off they'll just hang on the side like that. [ laughter ] >> seth: safety first. >> you just throw them back on. throw some doubloons.
again, i would think that the fun of new orleans is maybe made a bit less when you have kids on your float. >> greatly so. >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> my brother-in-law, my father-in-law, one of my best friends and my two brothers and my other brother-in-law were on the float behind me. and they're like, "oh my god. everybody was flashing us." i'm like, "that's because you weren't surrounded by 11-year-olds." you know? [ light laughter ] everywhere i went, like, literally, women were like, "it's the king!" oh, no, no. i'm like, "send the kids to the other side of the float." [ laughter ] by far the most annoying thing about mardi gras. >> seth: i like that even at a certain level of inebriation, a girl knows not to flash an 11-year-old. >> yeah, exactly. i'm like, oh my god. but the kids, you know, they're nine, they're ten, they're 11. they're taking biology, they're taking p.e. >> seth: yeah. >> you know? >> seth: it's time to see it. >> that's helping. that's teaching. >> seth: that is class. that's learning. >> you know what i mean? teach the kids.
>> seth: now you play falcon. >> i am falcon. >> seth: you are falcon. [ cheers and applause ] and these films, top secret. >> seth: everything marvel, top secret. >> seth: you have to keep a lid on everything. >> or they will blow dart you. >> seth: and yet you gave an interview where you seemed to have revealed that the hulk would be in the next film. >> it's so ridiculous. was giving respect to my fellow actors. >> seth: yeah. >> i said marvel movies are so great because they have great actors. the likes of mark ruffalo, scarlett johansson, robert downey jr. [ cheers ] love that guy. [ laughter ] and, you know, people take that to mean that i'm saying this is what the movie is about and this is the movie. >> seth: naming fellow cast members. >> right. so if i say the movie's long, "anthony mackie relates that 'civil war' is over two hours." i'm like, "no, i just said the movie is good. it's long." >> seth: yeah. but that's the danger, i guess, of doing press for anything
they want everything. >> the first rule of marvel, don't talk about marvel. >> seth: don't talk about marvel. >> i have no idea what you're talking about. i'm not even in the movie. [ laughter ] >> seth: oh, you're not? >> no. >> seth: okay, that's good to know. oh, that's right, that's me if the falcon suit. >> right, right, right, right, right. >> seth: now -- >> captain america, get the -- out of here. [ laughter ] >> seth: so you have been an actor for awhile. this is something i heard years ago that you did, and i believe you still do it. which is when you take on a role, you want to be able to answer 68 questions about the character. >> yes. >> seth: now you want to be able -- any character you play, like what sort of questions do you want to know? >> well, you know, your last name. >> seth: okay. >> everybody know their last name. >> seth: yes. >> like, your first pet's name. your school, your first elementary school, the street you grew up on. stuff like that. i feel like if you're building a person, the person would know that about himself. >> seth: so every character you play, do you just make up answers to al this stuff? >> i have a notebook with all those answers. >> seth: are there any other weirder ones other than like pets and stuff.
questions that are for personal consumption. [ laughter ] like what was falcon's first pet's name? >> funny enough, falcon's first pet was a hamster which he killed and his name was jedidiah. >> yeah. great name, right? great name. great name. >> seth: i can't believe there's more personal stuff than you >> jedidiah. he killed him. killed him. >> seth: well, he turned around. falcon's done good stuff since. >> seth: thank you so much for being here. always a pleasure to see you. anthony mackie, everybody. "triple 9" opens everywhere on friday. we'll be right back with renee elise goldsberry. [ cheers and applause ] folks, you can't make this stuff up. four bandits chose a prius as their getaway car. bravo-niner, in pursuit of a toyota prius. over. how hard is it to catch a prius? over. this thing is actually pretty fast. over. very funny.
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>> seth: i am just so happy and excited to have you here. >> i am so happy and excited to be here. >> seth: i am, of course, one of the many people that have seen "hamilton" and was just blown away by the show, by your performance. and then, this is very exciting, the show won a grammy and you guys got to perform at the grammys. well, not at the grammys, on the broadcast. you performed at your theater -- >> we did. >> seth: and they went to you guys live there. was it -- obviously you perform on that stage every night during the show. you must get used to it to some degree. were you more nervous doing it sort of for a grammy audience, even though you were in your home theater? >> yeah, you know, i don't think they were nervous, because we've been through a lot of really exciting moments. we performed for the president >> seth: right, so those grammys dummies, that's nobody. >> no, no. and the beauty of the grammys is that we were in our home theater and we were kind of -- we had a padded audience full of a lot of loving fans. >> seth: yes. >> it wasn't like, you know, adele was sitting right there. >> seth: right, that's nice.
it's such a diverse audience of musicians. >> seth: and i guess the show, it seems like the cast and the show in general have been careful to keep it in the home theater as much as possible. >> we have, because there's the feeling that it's been hyped so much, that if i came out here and i all of a sudden started rapping for you, it might kind of steal some of the magic that happens. >> seth: yeah. >> that might not be true, but with that and it's worked very well. and the grammys was so generous to allow us to live stream our own opening number for their telecast. it was a gift to us. >> seth: and another gift, which you did not realize at the time, you thought the show had won a grammy. you didn't realize that you also won a grammy. >> i did not. >> seth: so how did you find out -- [ cheers and applause ] congratulations. >> thank you so much! this would be the official first moment that i had a crowd of people applauding me about a grammy and i actually knew about it. [ laughter ] yeah, i have been dreaming of winning a grammy since
grammys in the 80s, and the irony is when i actually won one i had no idea. >> seth: that's fantastic. >> so in 1959, they established this grammy for the best music theater album, and it used to go to the lyricist and the composer and the producers. and, like, three years ago they decided to include the principle performers on the album, but nobody told us. so i'm sitting there behind lin-manual miranda, our show's star and creator and alex lacamoire, our show's music director and producer of the album, and i'm happy for them because they're giving a speech. and i'm happy for questlove and black thought, because i thought they won this grammy. and i found out two days later that i had won one too. [ light laughter ] >> seth: that's -- here's the great thing. here's why you're really lucky. it's so good you aren't bitter, because otherwise if you had been like, "how come i don't win one?" >> i know. >> seth: people would have been like, "she just won a grammy. why is she so upset?" >> i know. i know. i have like, the ugliest smile of happiness on my face, so you can't tell that i have no idea. >> seth: that's fantastic.
auditioned for the part, yes? >> i did. >> seth: but you almost didn't, which is so hard for me to imagine, because it's hard now to imagine anybody else playing the role. what was your initial hesitation going in? >> do you have children? >> seth: i don't have children. >> oh, okay. >> seth: about to, though. >> okay. what? >> seth: yeah. >> oh my god. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: thank you. and much like the grammy, i didn't know. [ laughter ] just found out. >> yeah. okay. yeah so i just, i have a son who is six. i have a daughter, a beautiful young daughter and i was on a self-imposed maternity leave with my daughter. and it's so funny. every time you feel like -- every time someone says to me, "i'm done with this business. i'm going to do something really lofty," i'm like, "you're going to be huge." like, that's when the best things happen to you. >> seth: right. >> so i was kind of in that moment in my life and they sent me a demo of that song. a song that my character sings in the first act. it's called "satisfied." it's a beautiful amazing song. [ applause ] >> seth: you just nail it.
i heard lin-manuel miranda singing it in this demo and i just thought -- [ bleep ] can i say it? >> seth: yeah, you can say it. [ bleep ] >> seth: yeah, great. [ laughter ] >> seth: perfect. >> because it's the mother load. i couldn't understand what he was even saying, but i knew it was so brilliant. i knew every couplet was so brilliant. i knew that the world was changed, at least my world was >> seth: wow, that's fantastic. >> yeah. >> seth: again, like i said, i can't imagine anyone else doing it now. you mentioned your children. have they seen the show? times. >> seth: three times? so, he's six. and does he just love it? >> he loves it. >> seth: okay, that's exciting. >> he loves it. i think it has something more to do with me being in it as well. >> seth: okay, he's a little bias. >> absolutely. he's a little bias. but, like, a lot of kids love this. there's a lot of kids -- if you google "hamilton" and "children," you will see a lot of children rapping. >> seth: i have watched some. especially trying to do your song, and it's very cute, because kids are very good until it gets to the super fast rapping and then i feel like children haven't developed that tongue yet. >> a lot of people haven't, but
there's a lot of people >> seth: that's good. you're inspiring a whole generation of historically accurate rappers. [ laughter ] now, your 3-year-old. that has to be too young to come to the show, yeah? with a need to be in anyway quiet, yes. >> seth: is she familiar with the songs at all? >> she's familiar with the songs. yes, she is. she walks around singing "you don't have the votes." she knows how to say that. something that we could all say a lot right now. >> seth: does she have any comprehension of what she means the votes?" >> i think she does. >> seth: okay. >> do you know if you're having >> seth: we know but we're keeping it a secret. okay. good for you. >> seth: thank you. understand everything. >> seth: yeah. >> i don't know what it is, but there's something like, you know, you could be changing her diaper and she's looking at you like, you know, i can get up off this table. like, she knows. about. she knows. >> seth: a 3-year-old walking around saying "you don't have the votes" is such a fantastic thing to imagine. it's like, "go to bed." she's like, "you don't have the votes." [ laughter ]
me to go to bed, but you need a majority." >> yes. we barely have one in our house. >> seth: you barely have one in your house. >> seth: i saw you did something on b.e.t. where you and lin and is it, daveed? >> daveed diggs. >> seth: daveed diggs, sorry. but the three of you did, you basically were almost, it seemed like free styling on b.e.t. have you been recognized from that? as a rap -- >> i actually have. >> seth: okay, so now not just -- people who haven't seen "hamilton" have approached you? >> yes, i am a rapper. >> seth: oh, you're a rapper now? [ light laughter ] >> i'm a rapper. >> seth: and how did it happen? >> well, we had an opportunity to do the b.e.t. hip-hop cypher. >> seth: gotcha. >> that's actually one of the beautiful things about being a part of this show is that so many communities that you never thought would be embracing of music theater have really embraced us. and one of them would be the b.e.t. hip-hop cypher crowd. >> seth: yes. >> which is great, because they really legitimize the fact that this has really wonderful, strong hip-hop, you know, sentiment. >> seth: right, that puts real authenticity on it.
yeah, i live in harlem anyway. so there you go. >> seth: yes. >> but yeah, i was just coming to work, i was coming to broadway on the train. and this woman came up to me and she said, "i'm sorry. i don't mean to bother you, but are you a rapper?" and i was like, "i'm sorry, what?" she's like, "are you a rapper?" and i was like, "oh my god." she was like, "i'm sorry to bother you, i recognized you, but i just wanted to know if you're a rapper?" and i was like, "oh my god. will you take a picture with me?" [ laughter ] >> seth: wait. usually that's when they ask for a picture with you. >> i know, i know. i just was like i wanted someone else to believe, so i made this lady take a picture with me on the train. and i was like, "do you want me to send it to you?" and she was like, "no, i'm good." [ laughter ] >> seth: also, photos work when you say i met a celebrity. look. you're showing people this person you've never seen asked me this. >> i know. but it's like, i'm always amazed. like 30 million people watched the grammys and, i mean, millions of people watch the b.e.t. hip-hop awards and these
necessarily spend a million dollars to come and see broadway shows. >> seth: yeah. >> and when we burst that bubble and we've been able to do that with this show, it really recognizes just the significant accomplishment. so it's beautiful that you had us here. it's beautiful that we get to go to the white house, we get to do all of these wonderful things. >> seth: well, it's so well earned. the only thing i say is the next time someone asks you "are you a rapper," try to channel your inner kanye west and be a little cooler about it. >> i know, i mean, i need some bling. no, i think they're pretty good with everybody. but yeah, i'm really grateful that it's been more of an inclusive experience, because sometimes art is so segmented. >> seth: yeah, well, that was, i think, the thing i was most taken with when i went to see the show, knowing what it was. and before it started, you look at the audience and you're like, "oh, there's so many different kind of people here." and it's just so fantastic that everyone, i feel like, consumes it and enjoys it on the exact same level. it's quite an accomplishment. congratulations. thank you so much for being here. >> thank you so much. thank you for having me. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: renee elise goldsberry, everybody. "hamilton" is currently playing
neal brennan. [ cheers and applause ] to get 0% financing for 60 months on a ford suv. that's right. just announced. ford explorer...edge...escape... and expedition... are available with 0% financing for 60 months. ford suvs. designed to help you be unstoppable. no wonder ford is america's best selling brand. but hurry, 0% financing for 60 months on ford suvs is a limited time offer. see your ford dealer today. when laquinta.com sends craig wilson a ready for you alert the second his room is ready, ya know what he becomes? great proposal! let's talk more over golf. great. how about over tennis? even better. a game changer! the ready for you alert, only at lq.com. red lobster's lobsterfest is back. so come try the largest variety of lobster dishes of the year,
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and she's the one who'll make a real difference for you. i'm hillary clinton and i approved this message. [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: our next guest tonight is
an emmy-nominated writer, comedian, and director, who co-created "chappelle's show." he's making his new york theatrical debut, with his stand-up show,"3 mics," which begins previews tomorrow and opens march 3rd at the lynn redgrave theater. please welcome back to the show, my very good friend, neal brennan.
>> seth: hi, buddy. >> hi, buddy. >> seth: i want to clarify because, you know, i'm a friendly person, and i say often on this show, "please welcome my friend." but this is real deal. you are one of my best friends. >> yeah, and i find it insulting every time you say it about other people. [ laughter ] >> seth: you do? yeah. >> yeah. >> seth: you feel like that's infringing upon our friendship. >> yeah. this bum on tv. >> seth: but we are -- we genuinely -- we've known each other for a very long time, and you are probably the last friend that i have that i talk to on the phone as often as we talk and for as long as we talk. >> yeah, we'll talk for like an hour and change. >> seth: yeah. >> last time we talked -- my girlfriend just moved in with me and, she had never heard us on the phone. "you guys sounded like two teenage girls." [ laughter ] which is, like, so like her to say that. >> seth: that is exactly what i would expect her to say. like, whatever. [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. it's like, why can't you appreciate neal has time with you, and then, he also has time with me. why --
>> sometimes she'll, like, go on my instagram and just, like, like stuff but, not comment. and it's, like, you gotta sort of do both? [ laughter ] >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] um, i -- you just -- and this is exciting, because the last time we talked -- it's very exciting. [ laughter ] because this bothers me, because i have not met your girlfriend, because we now live on opposite coasts. and i feel like i'm at a disadvantage. you just went and met her father for the first time. yes? >> i did, and it was in colorado. colorado is a big gun state, which i didn't realize. so, he's a big gun dude. like, he wears a concealed weapon on him all the time, and he was showing me his guns and telling me about his guns. and then, at a certain point, he pulls me aside, because we never met, and he goes, "do you have guns at your house, you know, just to be prepared?" and i was like, "do i have a gun? dude, i don't even have an umbrella." [ laughter ] like, i can't protect your
[ laughter and applause ] >> seth: yeah, that's not good. >> yeah. if someone breaks, in his daughter is in a lot of trouble. [ laughter ] >> seth: do you -- so, have you ever thought, "i need a gun?" >> well the terror thing happened in california, where i live. and i was thinking -- do you think you would be a good terrorist? >> seth: no. >> yeah -- because the woman, the san bernardino woman, came to the states and then waited for, like, six months. which i feel like, if they sent me over here, i feel like i would fall in love with american culture and then screw the whole >> seth: yeah. [ laughter ] >> and they'd call me and be infidel next week." and i'd be like, "look, fellas. april." [ laughter ] was gonna wait 'til july. [ laughter ] i'm gonna gain a little wieght. in. >> seth: i'll gain some blending-in weight. >> yeah. your show. >> yeah. >> seth: this is very exciting. i have seen you do stand-up. you're one of my favorite stand ups, but this show, and i want to show the poster again.
it's one of you. >> uh-huh. >> seth: and on stage, you have three microphones, and each microphone, you're doing a different kind of comedy act. >> yes, basically -- well, the middle mic is barely comedy. it's basically a stand-up mic, a one-liner mic, and then, the middle mic is, like, for like sort-of emotional truths. [ laughter ] >> seth: you share some >> yeah. >> seth: yeah. so you tell actual stories that happen in your life, and then, you use the other two mics, obviously, to put some comedy into these. >> yes, and i have -- i brought some one-liners. >> seth: one-liners? so this is a one-liner mic? >> yes. >> seth: so, that's great. we'd love to hear some. >> yeah, i have some -- hold on. let me -- this shouldn't take but a few minutes to take out. um, i'm vegan, but i'm a hypocrite about it. like, i wear leather, and i eat meat. [ laughter ] if i were black, i would stand in front of tanning salons all
[ laughter ] the internet is like a choose-your-own-adventure book, except every adventure ends with me masturbating. [ laughter ] >> audience: woo! >> thank you for the woo. [ laughter ] getting a neck tattoo is people's way of saying, "yeah, minimum wage is fine with me." [ laughter ] >> i have a good body for someone who doesn't workout. problem is i workout three days a week. [ laughter ] >> seth: these are excellent. >> yeah, thank you very much. [ laughter ] >> seth: you went to another page. does that mean you're gonna do more? >> i have three pages of one liners. [ laughter ] do you want one more? well, we feel like we need one more, now. it can't end with you looking at it. >> seth: so i think, when this is over, no matter what, you got >> you're right. [ laughter ] don't tell me how to live my life. [ laughter ] i like how on cop cars, "to protect and serve" is in quotes
[ laughter ] [ applause ] fold it up! fold it up! [ cheers and applause ] i also -- i couldn't help but notice a wonderful guy who you know better than i, but we both i notice john legend is >> yeah, he is. show. >> seth: now, that's exciting. >> yeah, it's great to be around his wife. >> seth: mm-hmm. [ laughter ] >> that's probably, like, the best part. >> seth: yeah. >> yeah, that's pretty much all i have to say about it. >> seth: okay, that's great. [ laughter ] now, one of the times that we spoke on the phone -- >> yeah. >> seth: i remember us talking, and one of the things i told you was, "hey, we're going to have a baby." i told you that. it was very exciting for me to tell my friend that. and, do you remember what you said to me? >> what did i say? >> seth: you said, "well, it's been nice knowing you." [ laughter ] >> yeah. >> seth: and i said, "come on." and you basically contend friendship is over. >> look, your wife barely wants me around now. [ laughter ] >> seth: that's not true. >> i'm, like, your last single
>> seth: yeah, that's true. >> like, if you sitcoms -- >> seth: she likes you plenty, but you're right. you're are my last single friend. >> yeah. i'm like, if your life is a sitcom, i'd come like with cereal, like, "is seth around?" [ laughter ] so, basically, now that our relationship is coming to an end, we had a great run. >> seth: great run. [ laughter ] historic. >> yes, i made a video montage, like, an "in memoriam" like at the oscars. i made a video montage about our friendship, but i didn't have very many pictures on my -- like, there's not many pictures of us together, because we just didn't take many pictures. >> seth: i would also contend our friendship started over a decade ago. it was a time -- >> before pictures. >> seth: no, people were not taking pictures the same way they're taking pictures now. >> yeah, you're absolutely right. >> seth: yeah. >> so, i basically made this. i didn't have many pictures of us, so i had to just use stuff i found on my phone and on the internet or whatever. >> seth: so, this is a montage. this is in memoriam of our friendship? >> yep. >> seth: that is ending because i'm having a child? >> yeah.
[ laughter ] [ laughter ] [ laughter ] [ laughter ] [ laughter ] [ laughter ] [ laughter ] [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: that last photo is us >> that's us at a night club, like, 10 years ago. and that's why you're having a baby, and i just asked a girl to move in. like, i'm so far behind you. >> seth: yeah. >> and it's because of the look on my face.
[ laughter ] i'm a lunatic. >> seth: that was the night club where, like, we went out to, like, meet girls. >> that's one of the most fun nights i'd had in years. [ laughter ] >> seth: thank you for being here, buddy. i can't wait -- >> thank you having me. >> seth: to see the show. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you. >> seth: everybody should see it. neal brennan, everybody. for more info go to 3mics.com. we'll be right back. my house. my house, too! my bed, my squeaky toy... my goodness is that
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